[upon finding out Annie's pregnant] You didn't do this just to get me to stay home and go to school, did you?
EAEric & Annie
No.
Well, you can't get me out of here now, things are just starting to get good.
S2 E21... And Girlfriends (2)
S3 E1It Takes Two, Baby
Just in case what isn't better?
My morning sickness.
Oh, give it up already.
MOMMY!
Simon, be nicer to your sister. This isn't easy on her and she's just a little girl.
You say it like it's a weakness or something.
I just want to know if Mom is feeling any better?
She can't fit into her pants, she's not gonna be happy until she can. Meanwhile, I have to find some place to take her for our 20th anniversary that's appropriately romantic, yet doesn't remind her that I'm the one that got her too big to fit in her pants. I've been down this road five times and it's a long cranky road.
I remember when you put on a few pounds you were cranky too.
Yeah, but that was different. I wasn't providing a nurturing environment for a developing human being. And I have to say if I were... I think I be thrilled. I'd be elated... I'd be...
...Miserable. You know, you think you know what it's like, but you don't, you really don't. You know nothing.
Nothing.
How is that I'm the one who has to watch every single morsel of food that I put into my mouth, and yet those crumbs turn into pounds and more pounds and more pounds, despite the fact that I've already puked most of what I've eaten the day before by the time I get out of bed the next morning?
Yeah, we're fat and we're sick.
And tired you know I'm really, really tired. It's not like having a baby at twenty or thirty, I'm….
Old.
And I've got six months to go. Six more months. Six months of trying to wear clothes that make me look...
Like you're having a baby. Our baby.
Yeah, our big fat baby.
Yeah, she's right. You know that I was seven months pregnant with Matt before I was in maternity clothes. And now, at three months look at me, I'm fat. I'm old. I'm tired. And I'm fat.
Yeah, I can't get in nothing of mine, neither.
You can't get into anything Ruthie, you don't fit into your clothes because you're getting bigger and that's because you're getting older.
Yeah, just like Mommy.
It's going to be okay.
It's not gonna be okay! It's only gonna get worse. I'm only gonna get fatter, and older, and tireder, and fatter! Then, when I'm at my oldest and tiredest and fattest, then I have to give birth to my fattest baby ever, probably with the world record head!
Yeah. If you ask me, the only thing you daddies have to do to make a baby is the fun part.
You know, maybe your tummy will be feeling better by lunchtime. Mommy's always is.
Give me an extra paper bag, just in case it isn't.
Just in case what isn't?
My morning sickness.
Oh, give it up! You're not sick, you're not tired, and you're not fat. You're just trying to get attention.
MOMMY! [runs upstairs]
Yeah. Whenever they're hurt, they run to Mommy, even when Dad is standing right there.
S3 E2Drunk Like Me
You and Simon need some guy stuff to do together. I don't want him to feel left out.
No, being left out is Lucy's job.
Mom, if you had to guess, what would you say the babies were?
Girls.
S3 E3Cutters
[to Matt] You look terrible.
It finally happened. Our son got rejected by a girl.
I can't believe it. Not my Matt! Why, you are the most handsomest guy on Earth, and if a girl doesn't like you, then something must be wrong with her.
Maybe your mom could call her.
You know, you two are really starting to sound like June and Ward Cleaver.
Really? Because up until now, you kind of reminded me of Wally. Wally never got rejected.
Maybe what you need is a tutor.
You mean an older-high-school-guy-who-looks-like-Brad-Pitt type of tutor?
Uh, no, I was thinking of a much-older-minister-who's-slowly-losing-patience-with-his-daughter type of tutor.
You know, none of this is like you, and I know why. I think your attitude is compliments of your new best friend Nicole.
Stop picking on my friend, okay? Because Nicole is here to stay, and in the future, stay out of my business. Especially my friend business.
I'm telling you there's something up with Nicole.
That's your opinion.
Look, I know no one wants to hear this, but I have to say something. Last night I saw Nicole in our bathroom cutting herself with a razor.
It makes no sense. I don't understand why Nicole would cut herself, why anyone would.
Well, a lot of girls do it. In fact, some experts believe that cutting or self-mutilation is the fastest growing problem with teenage girls outside of eating disorders.
If that's true, why haven't I heard of it?
No one talks about it much.
That maybe true with other people, but Nicole is my best friend. If she were doing this, I'd be the first to know.
There's a lot of shame that goes with cutting and Nicole wouldn't necessarily tell you or anyone else 'cause she's probably embarrassed that she does it.
Well, if she's embarrassed about it why doesn't she stop?
It's not that simple. See, sometimes when a person can't handle whatever emotional pain they're in, they cause physical pain to themselves. They'll take a razor or a knife or a pen and make little cuts that they can hide. And when you want to quit something like that, you have to find out what's causing the pain that's making you hurt yourself or you're never going to be able to stop doing the destructive behavior.
I'm so sorry, Dad.
For what?
I'm sorry you have such a dunce for a daughter. I'm so stupid about biology and Nicole.
I never want to hear you call yourself stupid again. You're not. Biology is tough and nobody knew about Nicole, not even her parents at first. So no blaming yourself for that either. I can't go to biology with you but, uh, if you need a substitute best friend, I'm always here.
TJTed Jacob
I can't believe she's cutting again. I guess I can believe it. My wife and I have been seeing some of the old warning signs. Her frequent trips to the bathroom, keeping the bedroom door always locked, wearing baggy clothes to hide the scars...
S3 E4The Legacy
Oh no.
SShelby
Not again. How could you leave your lunch in Geometry class again?
I don't know. Because I love a frenzied sweaty hallway sprint before lunch? Where's the straightest line from here to our Geometry room?
SShelby
I don't know.
You really gotta start paying more attention in class.
Oh, sorry to interrupt. I just left my lunch in here. Is that my lunch?
RMrs. Reese
I'm sorry, Lucy. I didn't know you'd be back.
You ate my lunch?
RMrs. Reese
Well, I figured if you were coming back for it, you'd've been here sooner.
It's a long hallway. A long windy hallway filled with obstacles that walk and shove and get in your way on their way to eating their own lunches.
RMrs. Reese
What's the shortest distance between two points? A straight line. You know, if you applied what we talked about in class, you might've gotten back here quicker and saved your lunch.
I just don't understand Geometry. I can't do that kind of thinking. I don't have that side of the brain or something.
RMrs. Reese
Really? Because it looks like you're not all that interested in Geometry and aren't really giving it your best shot.
It's hard to be interested in something you know you'll never use. I mean, never get.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's 7th Heaven pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.