No, we don't have a crazy..thing
Yeah we do! We're like Ross and Rachel, but just not gay...
S2 E12Subway Hero
Oh no Sir, I don't vote Republican or Democrat. Choosing is a sin, so I always just write in the Lord's name.
That's Republican. We count those.
Black people, don't vote! Did you know that in the amount of time it takes to vote you could play three games of pool? Three! Now that's fresh.
S2 E13Succession
Hey, nerds! Who's got two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today? [pointing both thumbs at herself] This moi.
I just need him awake for a few minutes, can't you... inject something directly into his heart?
Oh, I'd like nothing better. Unfortunately, we have no way of knowing where the heart is. See, every human is different.
My genius will not be denied! I'm like Mozart! You're like that guy who was always jealous of Mozart.
Salieri?
No thank you. I already ate.
S2 E14Sandwich Day
WHERE'S MY MACARONI AND CHEESE!?!?
I even stopped to catch a snowflake with my tongue, but apparently that's some signal in Chelsea.
WHERE'S MY SANDWICH?!?!
Lutz made us do it.
LLutz
No, it was Frank.
THAT'S IT! This is all my fault, Miss Lemon. Because I let it happen. And the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
Please ask my permission before you quote me, Kenneth!
I don't know how, but you're gonna get me another sandwich. Or I'm gonna cut your face up so bad, you'll have a chin. YOU'LL ALL HAVE CHINS!
A drinking contest?!? What am I, 12 and at my boyfriend's frat party?!
Alcohol? This smells like Hill-people milk. I've been drinking this since I was a baby!"
WHERE'S MY MAC AND CHEESE!?
S2 E15Cooter
[as water pours from the ceiling] The ceiling appears to be leaking.
CCooter
No, it's not. We looked into it and it's not.
RCRandom Congressman at meeting
I can't support that. Dam is a swear word. I'd support it if instead of dam we called it a "god finger".
(looking at her calendar) Ugh... why don't I cross out the days like people in the movies?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's 30 Rock pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.