30 Rock quotes

268 total quotes



All Seasons  Season 1   Season 2   Season 3  
Season 4
  Season 5   Season 6  



Avery: Who is number one in your speed dial?
Jack: BlackBerry, Warren Buffett. iPhone, Jimmy Buffet.
Avery: Favorite movie?
Jack: Tie -- The Fountainhead or Uncle Buck.

Buzz Aldrin: I'm sorry if I upset you. Would you like to yell at the moon with Buzz Aldrin?
Liz Lemon: Yes, please.
[Both turn to the moon]
Buzz Aldrin: I own you!
Liz Lemon: You dumb moon!
Buzz Aldrin: I walked on your face!
Liz Lemon: Don't you know it's day? Idiot!

Danny: She has really thin lips, but she makes up for it with tongue girth.

Frank: Tracy, did you hear? Fred Dawkins, the incredibly overweight guy Pac-man was based off of, died.
Tracy: I will eat a bowl of cherries and some ghost meat in his honor.

Jack: Every division of the company is reaching out to the middle of the country. Our new mammogram machine is called the "Git 'R Done 2000".

Jack: Good God, Lemon, your breath! When did you find time to eat a diaper you found on the beach?

Jack: He built GE into the greatest company on Earth, and the Earth into one of the top three planets in the universe!
Tracy: It's like a black barbie doll in Arizona - nobody's buying it!

Jack: I like you, Kenneth, but you do not want to mess with me right now. I am in the middle of a RAGING PERIOD... of economic turmoil.

Jack: Lemon, the grown-up dating world is like your haircut. Sometimes, awkward triangles occur.
Liz: I feel like you've been saving that one.

Jack: Moron says what?
Devon: What?
[Jack snickers and closes the phone]
Devon: Moron says what? Jack? ...Jack?

Jack: That's what I'm talking about, empathy. It's about as useless as the Winter Olympics... this February on NBC.

Jack: The television audience doesn't want your elitist, east coast, alternative, intellectual, left wing...
Liz: Just say Jewish Jack, this is taking forever.

Jack: The world is made by those who control their own destiny. It isn't made by those who don't do, it's made by those who do do. Which is what made me the man I am, I do do.
Liz: Yeah, you do.
Jack: Grow up, Lemon.

Jack: We'll trick those racecar-loving wide-loads into watching your lefty homoerotic propaganda hour yet!

Jack: Weird... in a good way. Like going to the gym drunk.