This thing's a real cash cow - unlike Cash Cow, the NBC spinoff of Cash Cab. You try riding a cow through midtown Manhattan, Lemon. The animal will panic.
S6 E1Dance Like Nobody's Watching
S6 E2Idiots are People Two
Remember when I offended stubborn people? That took forever to sort out.
DRDenise Richards
Don't talk to me like I'm stupid! I played a nucular psychiatrist in a James Bonk movie!
S6 E3Idiots are People Three
CCriss
You don't use the tab closers on cereal boxes!
If you think those are doing anything to seal in freshness, you are living in a fantasy world, pal.
Kelsey Grammer (performing as Abraham Lincoln): I know that future generations will forge a stronger country, and that, someday, America will be a place... where everybody knows your name.
S6 E4The Ballad of Kenneth Parcell
AAmy
Ugh, I hate it when they put the movie poster on the cover of the book that the movie is based on.
Let me imagine what Peeta Mallark looks like, and how his arms smell of bread.
S6 E5Today You Are a Man
AAccountant
My son Adam is a huge, huge fan!
Yes, many of our viewers are obese.
Whatever you do, don't speak first. Ninety percent of negotiations are lost by the person who speaks first. Because what is speaking a sign of?
AMAudience member
...weakness?
You - out. Fired.
S6 E6Hey Baby, What's Wrong?
Oh, Diana, you're here, I thought you'd be at the house.
Oh yes, I dropped my bags off and shook hands with the baby but I wanted to come talk to you about Avery's situation.
Extracting an American from North Korea is a, ah, is a lot more difficult than arranging a round robin paddle tennis tournament.
What about arranging three round robin paddle tennis tournaments?
You know what? Avery loved a good fight. She used to call the cable company to dispute our bill just for the sport of it. She wouldn't stand for this dog and pony show.
I've organized several dog and pony shows and I'm offended by what you're implying.
How are you Avery's mother?
We have several things in common, Jack. We both married much, much older men -- which can be hard, or more often flaccid.
S6 E8The Tuxedo Begins
This is a sign. The lower classes are getting cranky about the rich earning all of their money away from them. Can't they see this is in their best interest? How could we pay their salaries without using their money? We're on the verge of a class war.
You have no interest in helping me. You're one of them. What do you make, five figures?
LWLenny Wozniak
Forty grand a year. But don't let the woman who is blackmailing me know that.
And the police have no interest in helping me either – despite the hundreds of dollars a year I pay in taxes!
PPaul
Yawns are contagious. Like all the Thai STDs my penis is about to give you.
Liddy is at a baby leadership conference this week. The timing is perfect.
I know what you're doing. The first time I got mugged I didn't leave my room for a week. I hid. But not in a tuxedo. All I had was a Chewbacca costume made out of used hair extensions. It made me feel invincible. Like someone who wouldn't get scared and freeze up when they got mugged.
Perfectly executed Chewbacca sound!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's 30 Rock pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.