Apdnarg quotes from Yu-Gi-Oh!

[as Joey activates his Graceful Dice magic card] Ah-ha! I had a hunch you might try that! And that's why I played this… Legendary Gambler!

Joey

No! What was that?!

This trap card automatically activates whenever my opponent rolls a die. So if I roll a higher number than you, your card is cancelled out!

Joey

WHAT?! [rolls a 4] Four!

[rolls a 5] Too bad!

Joey

So what?! Joey always has a backup plan! [activates his Skull Dice trap] Now, Skull Dice will lower your monster's strength depending on what number I roll!

The Legendary Gambler is a continuous trap card which means I also roll again!

Joey

[rolls a 5] Five!

[rolls a 6] Oh, well! Read it and weep!

Joey

No!

Looks like we're back where we started! So, Wandering Mummy, attack his Swordsman! I know you, Joey. Better than you know yourself.

Now I play… a magic card known as Ancient City!

Joey

What is that thing?

Well, as the card's name suggests, it's an ancient city, but that's just the beginning of my archeological assault! Next, I sacrifice Wandering Mummy… in order to summon my Ancient Giant! Of course, it comes with a slight catch. As long as it remains face up on the field, I have no choice but to attack you with it. And if I don't attack, then I lose 300 of my Life Points.

Tristan

Joey doesn't stand a chance against that thing!

I'd suggest summoning a monster if you'd like to stay in the game, Joseph.

Joey

I can arrange that. In fact, I'll play five for the price of one! Go, Goblin Attack Force! Now, knock his Ancient Giant right out of the ballpark, boys!

Not so fast, slugger! Activate Ordeal of a Traveler! This card is about to make the game more interesting. I choose a random card from my hand, and you have to guess whether it's a magic, trap, or monster card. If you guess incorrectly, your monster is returned to your hand. Guess correctly, and you can attack. So what type of card do I have in my hand? Let's go. You've got a 1-in-3 chance.

Yugi's grandpa is beating Joey at his own game!

Tristan

'Cause he knows Joey's strategy. He did teach him how to duel, after all.

Joey

Well, here goes. It's a trap card-- or a magic card. It's a monster! [having trouble guessing] I NEED MORE TIME!

I'm not getting any younger.

Joey

All right, my answer is… you're holding a trap card!

[imitates buzzer] Survey says, "monster card!"

Joey

That was my next guess.

I'm afraid your goblins will have to wait. Now, my eyesight's not what it used to be, but it looks to me like you're defenseless!

Joey

[setting a card facedown] I end my turn.

Sounds good to me.

Joey

All right, you wanna see some mad skills?!

Bring it on, kid!

Joey

Here goes! Look out! Time to give my luck one more shot with a magic card called Roll of Fate! This card allows me to draw up to six new cards depending on what number I roll, just as long as I remove the same number of cards from the game.

Now, Legendary Gambler, cancel out his roll!

Joey

Wheeler gets a four, and the freak in the mask gets… a three! He shoots, he scores, he draw four cards! That's what I call a hand!

Please tell me you're bluffing.

Joey

You're about to find out, pal.