[to Helen] You're alluring and desirable... and something else and when I sleep you dance through the Netherlands.
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
I played some ball in high school too.
Played semi-pro myself. Had guys like you for lunch.
[looking at Roy's belly] Must have had quite a few of them.
Roy's son R.J. said he wanted to learn the cello. Fat chance in Roy approving that!
Roy approaches lunch counter
Helen, R.J. told me he wanted to take cello lessons.
Well, yes Roy. Before you object..
Come to think of it, I thought over his request and realized he has been too top-heavy on sports. For the college admission boards, athletes are a dime a dozen. Another extracurricular activity like music would look good for college applications.
Great, I must be honest, I am surprised you would approve Roy.
Nothing is too good for my boy. Besides, it would behoove him to take in some culture.
Roy departs
Now you can share your gift with R.J.
Forget that! The Celtics lost again and I need the teaching fee to pay off my bookie!
OK R.J. let us practice note by note. Before we begin let me say you are older than most of my students so the books I have are geared for younger kids. Please do not think it is an insult to your intelligence.
RBRoy "R.J." Biggins Junior
No problem.
Helen opens book
OK, this mama hen represents the whole note and these baby hens are symbolic of the eighth notes.
RJR.J.
Look, a rabbit!
OK, I think you got the hang of it.
Helen has just undergone oral surgery
Woe, dood u et da qillow?
Pardon?
Illow!
Joe gets pillow
Dank oo.
Sorry, it is just a little hard to understand with your mouth stuffed with cotton. Could you just say for me "You have dishonored the Corleone family"?
Ruck woo!
No need to repeat, I got that one!
Unbeknownst to Helen, Joe is hosting a college basketball party while she is asleep. Guys are cheering the Boston College-Providence College game which concludes. When Joe goes to check on Helen, she is gone
Helen must have been sleepwalking! She could not have gotten far, she was there when I checked just before third period. Boston College, you guys look on the street; Providence College fans comb the beach!
Partygoers go look for Helen; next morning Helen is back in bed and recovered
Joe, I appreciate you taking care of me and willing to sacrifice watching the game with the guys.
Hey, that is what being in a relationship is all about.
I just had the weirdest dream that I was walking near the lighthouse and some guys led me home.
Well, you know the doctor used some heavy anesthesia!
I couldn't have possibly done it, either, because I was dressing a pig in the coach's wife's lingerie at the time.
You were wearing lingerie or the pig was?
I was. What do you take me for, a pervert?
Captain Jazzbo? You've murdered Captain Jazzbo!!! I'll see you fry for this, Biggins!
I'd like to see Joe without his color-coded binder. I got this all under control.
Kenny{exasperated}: Mr. Hackett, the plane is missing!
An exhausted Brian has dealt with all the headaches when the disappeared plane mysteriously reappears. Slumped in his chair Joe returns from his FAA medical testing
Joe! I am so glad you are back.
Glad to be appreciated. How did it go?
I am glad the day is over.
Well, you sound beat. Something happen?
Joe, you are not going to believe this but, the plane vanished from the hangar!
I know.
You know?!
Of course; the men from New Bedford took the plane up to inspect it for the 100-hour check. Didn't you know, it was all there under the yellow section of the binder, which had the day's planned events.
Brian grimaces
If "ifs" and "buts" were candy and nuts, we'd all have a wonderful Christmas.
MPMaury Povich
The "Culinary Killer" has been described as a matronly woman who waits on people hand and foot, then poisons them after gaining their trust. She has believed to have been married three times, all of her husbands murdered by her. We are now showing you a computer-generated age progression to show what she may look like today.
Brian is watching the show, then reacts with horror as the photograph is shown to resemble Fay
Airport lounge. People are watching fugitive show
MPMaury Povich
In an update to our last program, the "Culinary Killer" was apprehended in a Chicago soup kitchen. We want to thank our viewers for their attention and vigilance for bringing this killer to justice. Calls came in all across the United States, as far west as Astoria, Oregon and as far east as Nantucket, Massachusetts.
Everyone looks at Brian, believing they know who made the call for the latter
You care more about this stupid plane than you do about me!
Me? You are the one with the cello between her legs eight hours a day!
Well, at least that gives me some satisfaction!
Yeah, well, at least when I am in the plane I get some sense of movement!
Antonio, I did not know you played guitar.
AAntonio
Barely; I started a few months ago. I only know one song.
Then play that.
AAntonio
It is a folk song I used to hear back in my native Italy. For a long time it was the only English I knew.
Antonio strums guitar
Antonio{singing}: My goat knows the bowling score, alleluia. My goat knows the bowling score, al-lay-loo-hoo-hoo-hoo-ya.
It is Michael, Row the Boat Ashore.
AAntonio
No kidding!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Wings pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.