Susan Vandom quotes from W.I.T.C.H.

Okay, birthday girl, but remember, no matter how old you get, you'll always be my Pink Perky Poopy Pumpkin.

[after seeing Will's bad grades] Okay, how's this for a formula: 2 Cs + D * by gum = no movie this weekend.

I’m sorry, sir. But I received my daughter’s report card today, and her grades simply aren’t improving. I have to put her well-being first. She hasn’t adjusted to Heatherfield. I’d like to request a transfer... out of town.

It’s like I have two daughters: Will and her evil twin.

I hope you have a good explanation for being gone half the day?

Go on Will, and don't forget, make lots of new friends today! I put a dozen extra cookies in your lunch, to help break the ice with the other girls.

Will

[sarcastically] Gee, that'll make me popular.

Hello? No, I'm sorry, Irma. Will's lost phone privileges for the week. That's right. Goodbye.

If I might suggest...

Will

No! This is all your fault! [She threatens to throw him out the window]

No, please! No more talking in class! Cross my circuits!

Will

Whatevs. [She leaves Sammy on the windowsill]

Oh, look, Sandpit. I think we just found evidence of a crime.

A toast to A-minuses and good friends.

Thanks, Mrs. V, but Will did all the work.

Will

Well, I couldn't have done it without [Sees Matt entering] Matt.

Matt?

Will

I mean, Taranee. I need to use the restroom.

A slumber party?

Will

[In Susan's voice] What tipped you off?

This is just the kind of behavior I've been talking about, Will. You didn't ask permission and don't even seem sorry.

Will

No, I am sorry. I just... everyone was so bummed about us moving that they wanted to stay over and we're already in our PJs.

Your parents know? [The girls nod] Then lights out. We'll discuss consequences in the morning.

Did you forget you promised to get this laundry done?

Will

Hmm, I don't know. Did you forget you promised to stop seeing my teacher?!

Will, I...

Will

Dating? Fine. Dating my teacher? Gross, but also fine. Lying to me about it while lecturing me on responsibility? Priceless!

Will

If I make things so unpleasant, why work so hard to bring me here?

Since you’re here, why work so hard to make things so unpleasant?

Dean

You know, you two are really more alike than you think. [Will and Susan glare at him] Which is meant as a compliment!

Will

That would be our celebration pizza. Got any money?

It's comforting to know something's haven't changed.

Will

[gasps] Dad!

So, when we're done, maybe I can take you and your friend for a spin?

Will

And blow off the car wash? Coolsome!

[to herself] A few minutes in a convertible does not make up for months of absence!

Have you seen the girls? They’re not in the van.

Nope. Someone gave them the idea you can just skip out on responsibility.

They said they went to get water.

From where? The Caribbean?

We have to get back to Cornelia!

Will

Huh, good luck. I'm not even sure my mom is bothering to blink.

[seeing Will barefoot] Will, where are your shoes?