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SEASON 1

Victorious · Season 1

Victorious Season 1 quotes

532 quotes · page 33 of 36

Victorious

All S1

S1 E15Unfinished Business

I'm so hungry.

I have to tinkle.

How long have we been here like this?

About 9 hours.

Man, I can't believe we did this to ourselves. Just to get a stupid Pear Pad 3.

Well, it does have a slightly better screen.

Robbie?

Yeah?

If you say that 1 more time, I'm gonna grab your head and pull it right off your body.

(Teasingly and Sing-songly) Slightly better screen! (Andre tries to grab Robbie's arm but the latter hides it in his pear costume and continues to tease Andre) Slightly better screen! Slightly better screen!

(on the phone to Tori, as Cat) Hi, Tori! Um, my brother locked me in the closet and I'm really bored and I just wanted to know what you guys were doing. (laughs)

(to herself) That's so disrespectful.

(Jade and Cat are driving looking for Tori and Beck on their date)

Well?

Thank you for the ice cream cone.

I bought you the ice cream so you'd tell me where Tori and Beck are.

I don't know where they are!

(Jade opens Cat's window and throws her ice cream out)

I feel like you did that on purpose.

God, I hate being stuck in traffic! We're gonna be late, and we're gonna miss Beck and Tori. ugh (blows horn)

HONK!!! (giggles) I honked. Just like your car. Oh, let's think about all the different kinds of honks there are. I like the one that's like "meep-meep." You know, like the bird does it in the cartoons.

The Roadrunner?

No, I don't like him. He's so mean to that dog.

That "dog" is a coyote.

Oh, my god! Was that racist???

How do you know so much about animal hospitals cat?

My brother has a turtle with "special problems.

(Jade and Cat walk into the vet office where Tori and Beck are kissing)

Wow, Tori and Beck are here! Who'da thunk that they'd be...I mean what a coincide- ah, who am I kidding?

You have no right to be mad at us because you and Beck broke up and we like each other, ok?!

I'm not.

[surprised] You're what?

I'm not mad.

Careful, it's a trick!

It's not a trick. I...I thought I was mad, but now that I'm here, what do I have to be mad about? We broke up, we're all friends, (gestures to Tori) kind of. I mean, any of us should be able to hang out with whoever we want.

Still thinkin' it's a trick.

You realize we'll probably die up here? Hungry...thirsty...alone on our backs...dressed like fruits. But, at least I'm gonna die with my good friend. (takes Andre's hand) You.

We're not gonna die like this, Rob.

We're not?

Nope. We're gonna live. We have to live.

Why?

So we can get out of here. And I can hurt you. (Robbie pulls his hand away) With my own bare hands. (Robbie pulls his head and hands in his costume) Or maybe a baseball bat. Yeah, a bat. I like that.

Don't you just love how dogs hang their heads out the window and lick the wind? Watch. (She hangs her head out the window, pants and barks)

Pull your head back in the car before I roll up the window and cut it off!

(pulls her head back in, frightened) My head's back in the car.

Now call Tori and find out where Beck's taking her.

(to herself) Bossy.

What?

Calling Tori!

Hi!

Oh, hi, Cat.

Hi! (pause) Oh, wait, I already said that.

It's alright.

So, you guys are all gonna go see the big bone tomorrow night?

No, Andre and Robbie decided they're gonna make a video to try to win the new Pear Pad 3.

Oh, I hear it has a new screen. Slightly better.

It's very exciting.

So you don't have any plans tomorrow night?

No, I do. Beck and I are gonna...

Oooooh...

Stop, it's not like a date.

Oh, right. (winks)

Stop doing that with your eye! We're just hanging out. You know, friends...ish.

Oh, so I can tell people you're going out with Beck?

We're not going out.

So you're staying in with him?

No!

I see you, girl.

Just don't tell anyone!

Ok. I'll keep your dirty secret. (winks repeatedly)

Hi, Jade!

Hey.

Do you wanna do something fun with me tomorrow night?

Sure, what?

I don't know. I figured you'd pick cause you're bossy.

Don't say I'm bossy!

Ok! (pause) But you are. (Jade glares) A little bit.

Whatever. Yeah, let's hang out tomorrow night.

Ok. But we can't ask Tori to go with us because she's -- (gasps in shock upon realizing she let it out)

What's Tori doing tomorrow night?

Nothing! I don't know. (pause) She told me not to tell you.

5!

Oh, god.

4!

Don't count!

3!

Oh, I love 3!

2!

Have you heard about the new Pear Pads with the slightly better screen?

1!

Ok, ok! (pause) Tori and Beck are going out together.

What?

But it's not a date, they're just hanging out as friends!

Ok. Well, I know what you and I are doing tomorrow night.

Going to see the big bone?

No. We're gonna find out where Beck and Tori are going and see whether they're just friends.

I thought you said I could pick what we do.

No, I'm picking. (walks away)

(to herself) Bossy.

What?

Nothing.

Is that a new shirt?

(looking pleased) Yeah.

Yikes! Why does it say I'm stupid?

It does not- (looks at her shirt) oh.

Where is he?

Hi.

I don't remember saying "come in".

I don't remember saying you could hog Moose.

What are you talking about?

(imitating Tori) Oh, Moose my goodness, I certainly do enjoy a fine game of hockey.

(imitating Tori) Oh, please take me to the hockey game, Moose. I'm ever so desperate!

I don't talk like that!

Whatever. You have been hogging Moose and you know it.

Moose hogger.

How can I hog a guy if he's not even here?!

Then where is he?

He said he wanted to hang out with Beck.

Hmmm.

I bet they're at Karaoke Dokie right now.

Cause that's where the hamburgers are.

Later.

Gator.

When my brother was little, he used to have a Tinkle Aid stand. (giggles) It was so cute, he'd stand around all day yelling "Tinkle Aid, twenty five cents a cup!"

I hope you meant he had a lemonade stand.

(giggles) No...

No, we don't want YOU!

Go get the ugly waiter!

[whispers] She's actually a dude!

These quotes come from Wikiquote's Victorious pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.