I just hope Piz isn't planning on moping his way through the remainder of freshman year. It's not like I'm taking an internship at a Mister Softee in Wachoota. It's the FBI. The F. B. I.
At the very least, Piz should think it's hot.
Actually, he does think it's pretty hot. He'd just think it was hotter if I were doing it in Neptune.
He wants to date you and be near you? Greedy little bugger.
And if he didn't care, I'd probably be complaining about that...to my girlfriend...while waiting to pay for frozen yogurt. I'm a girl!
Miss Mars uses Venus razor.
Because if she doesn't, her legs look like Pluto's.
And she's down-to-earth to boot.
I think I read in Teen People that a clean leg shave will make that special boy sit up and take notice.
I read in FHM that boys like bare breasts.
Interesting. I did not know that. Bare breasts, you say? Hm.
So, what's the protocol for a plane christening? I mean, does someone get to, like, smash the, uh, Sea Monkey with a miniature bottle of champagne?
The protocol? Pray to whatever god you believe in she flies. Otherwise, my ass is grass.
Orville Wright's exact words, if I recall.
I'm so nervous. This is totally knotting up my inner nerd.
Wait, you have an inner one?
I guess you're all asking yourself why I called this meeting. [pause] What? That's comedy gold
PPatrick
She knows about my dad's company.
And I know that Leon's cryptography research wasn't really stolen. Let's see one guy to steal the machine one guy to program it and everyone to point the finger at the ex-con maintenance guy and the injustice league strikes again
PPatrick
Who are you calling?
JJenny
She's calling her dad, the sheriff.
Good call Jenny, see you're not just here for your looks.
PPatrick
Hang up please we can work this out you can be one of us.
Is this where you turn me into a vampire?
PPatrick
We can make it worth your while.
PPatrick
So what is that maintenance guy paying you anyway?
PPatrick
Don't turn us in can give you your very own Hearst ID.
PPatrick
This one is the everlasting gobstopper of spending money ,you'll never have to pay for another textbook, another ticket to a campus performance, another meal.
Assuming that I want to eat meals in the food court for the rest of my life, besides you're lying, you don't have the machine you left it in the locker next to Mr. Navarro's
JJenny
There's a third one.
LLeon
I've already programmed it.
PPatrick
The only reason we got busted is cause we used stupid aliases we get new cards, generic names and we don't get caught again.
JJenny
You're a scholarship kid right.
PPatrick
Yeah its gotta be really tough paying for all those meals and textbooks.
It is which is why a bunch of kids who can afford to ski in Aspen getting their kicks by ripping off my school and blaming it on the nearest kid from the wrong side of the tracks pisses me off so much.
PPatrick
You think that ski picture is proof, that doesn't prove anything.
But this conversation does.
[begins to play a recording of the conversation on her phone]
I wont bore you with the rest but I'll bet it means jail time, or if you'd prefer you can go throw yourselves at the mercy of the campus police I'm sure they'll be more merciful than my dad, especially after he finds that third machine in one of your dorm rooms.
JJenny
Like we keep it in a dorm room.
If I don't hear by tomorrow that the charges against my client have been dropped by tomorrow afternoon I'm taking everything I've got to the finest sheriff's department in Balboa county. And try to keep it down in here, okay, it's a library.
