Alan and Charlie in “My Damn Stalker”

Are you gonna let me explain or not?

What's to explain? You have a Malibu beach house and you're the... "Chiropractor to the Stars".

Oh, OK, what do you want me to call myself? "Chiropractor to Fat People in the Valley"? Everybody exaggerates on these things.

OK, I can understand that. You're probably not gonna get a lot of responses to "bushy-nosed cheapskate, enjoys long walks to a free meal."

Exactly.