Top Gear · Season 10, Episode 10
“December 23, 2007” · Season 10, Episode 10
In this episode: Jeremy Clarkson (6), James May (2), Richard Hammond (1), David (1)
[During the opening sequence.]
Tonight: The great, the good and the rubbish on the Top Gear Awards. We go on a motoring holiday with The Stig. And Doctor Who travels through space and time a bit more slowly than usual.
[shouting during his speed lap] Speed up!
[on the Stig]
Some say that as we speak he is actually relaxing in the resort pool, and he is, he is actually.
[on the Stig]
Now for this race, I shall pilot the little remote control car, because to get the best out of the G-Wiz for this test, it needs to be controlled by our finest driver: someone who has never sat on Santa's knee; someone who's never watched Moonraker on Boxing Day. [Which was indeed shown three days later on Boxing day by the BBC's main rivals ITV]
[on the old Jaguar S-Type]
You see, Mr. Jonathan Foreigner has this ridiculously outdated view of what Britain is. He thinks we all live in Anne Hathaway's cottage and then go out to Ye Olde Tea Rooms where we eat some Kendal mint cake. And then maybe we'll go out and find a red phone box and ring up some Beefeaters at the Tower of London to see if we can have our bowler hats back. It's rubbish!
[Nominees for the 'Lifetime Achievement Award']
Ken Livingstone for deciding that if you earn a living and pay tax and spend some of what's left on a car; and then pay Value Added Tax on that, and then buy some Road Fund Licence Tax to put the car on the road, and then pay Fuel Duty Tax on the fuel and Value added tax on that Fuel Duty tax, You should then pay 25 pounds - TAX! - to drive into the centre of the capital.
[David Tennant looking in the wing mirror on his power lap]
Why am I looking in the wing mirror? There's no one behind me!
[On David Tennant's inability to find third gear on his lap]
Do you know where third gear was after that? It was all over the track.
[David Tennant has challenged Billie Piper's time on the leaderboard, which was allowed to stand despite her cutting a corner]]
[to Tennant] If you'd worn a see through top you'd have been faster than Simon Cowell.
[whilst watching the M3 do a lap]
M3 drivers have no friends.
[At the end of the episode]
That's it for this programme and indeed this series. We're off now to get very drunk. Goodnight!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Top Gear pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
