SP
Tied for 5th most-quoted character in The Young Ones: in 4 of its 138 quotes
Most scenes with: Rick (3), Vyvyan (2), Neil (2)
Scenes with S.P.G 4
[While in the bathroom, Rick shouts through the wall to Vyvyan who is still in bed in his room.]
Vyvyan! Have you been using my roll-on deodorant? There's a revolting hair on it and it's not one of mine!
Because I know what mine looks like, Vyvyan! I can see them now! [raises arm and points to armpit.]
Not the ones on your bum you can't. Could be off your bum.
Oh, and I suppose you think being rude first thing in the morning is a terribly trendy thing to do, do you, Vyvyan? Well, it's not!
Look, it's probably a hamster hair. He was getting a bit whiffy so I gave him a good going over.
SPS.P.G.
And was I consulted, pally? How d'you think I feel stinking like a student's armpit?
It's stealing, Vyvyan! It's common stealing, and if you ever touch it again, EVER, I'm going to the police. I will, you know. I will go to the police!
[Vyvyan punches his fist through the wall to flip Rick a two fingered a salute.]
[The guys are now on University Challenge]
Hello, and welcome to another edition of University Challenge. This week, the teams represent Footlights College, Oxbridge...
AAudience
Rah! Rah! Rah! We're going to smash the oiks!
Yes, that's the spirit. And Scumbag College.
SPS.P.G.
Oh aye! Up Scumbag! Up Scumbag! [Audience boo at Scumbag] See you, Teddy bear! Come here! [headbutts Teddy bear]
Yes, well representing Footlights, we have Lord Monty...
[Lord Snot gives a posh-sounding laugh and sips champagne]
[Ms. Money-Sterling also gives a posh-sounding laugh and sips champagne]
...and Mr. Kendal Mintcake.
And representing Scumbag, we have Mike...
Prick... [A startled Rick looks to see a 'p' written in front of his name] Vyvyan... and Neil.
Vegetable rights and peace.
SPS.P.G.
Oh, is that right? I'm a Glaswegian.
[After a bank job. Everyone jumps into Vyvyan's car. But he drives it directly into a lamp-post.]
[hysterical] Oh, what have I done?! [sobs]
C'mon, Vyv, there's no time for that now.
My car! My beautiful, beautiful car!
Oh, no, it's the pigs! This is it, guys! I'll see you later! [exits the car]
[to Rick] Yellow chicken!
[to Vyvyan, who's still crying] You've got to forget about your car, Vyvyan! Start life again without it. After all, you've still got S.P.G.
I don't think so, Michael. He was asleep on the radiator!
[S.P.G. is crushed on the grill of the car. Bagpipe music plays as he floats above the car wearing angel wings and a halo.]
SPS.P.G.
See you later, you little whimp.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Young Ones pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
The Young Ones · 138 quotes
