They gave me a solid uranium watch! See? It glows in the dark! And in the light!
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
XAMr. X action figure
To the Egg-Salad Jet!
Wow, that's just how I'd sound if I sounded like that.
XAMrs. X action figure
You want a piece of me, punk?
SIR!! (Glowface stops screaming) Perhaps we could focus on world domination for a moment?
Aren't the Egg-Salads the dreamiest? (sighs) Wouldn't it be groovy to meet them?
You have met them, hundreds of times. You have been beaten senseless by them hundreds of times. You have sworn to destroy them hundreds of times!
(searching himself on the Internet) G... L... O... W... F... Ace. And search! Only three matches?! Internet, you mock my glory! (pause) Maybe if I make it two words. Two words.
Ah, Lorenzo. Any news on the X's?
Well, the word on the street is that Truman X ran away from home.
(eagerly) Ooh, do tell!
And he's built himself a miniature house so he can feel taller! (chuckles) Short people are so very amusing. (sees that Glowface is glaring at him and realizes his mistake) Oh, not all short people... I mean, not short! You're not short!
Shove a cork in it!
(takes a bite into his artificial turkey, then spits it out) Oh yeah, I made it out of plaster.
Why are you crying?
(sobbing) I dropped a brick on my foot.
(to Lorenzo Suave) I'll make a giant inflatable suit! ...You're just pretending to be interested, aren't you?
No no no, nothing fascinates me more than a big bag of hot air.
Yeah, it is pretty darn- wait, was that sarcasm?!
(sarcastically) No.
...Good!
(after Tuesday confesses about teasing Truman about his height) Wait, you did that to Truman?
No wonder he ran away! You are a poophead!
What're you gonna do--slowly lower us into an acid vat filled with robot sharks?
Uh... no? (looks behind himself at said death trap) Dang, that kid's good.
Indeed, sir.
(scolding Truman for his reckless behavior) You almost tore your poor father's head off!
I need my head for thinking!
(after Truman beat and tied him and Glowface up above the acid vat) Um, excuse me, we could use a wee bit of assistance. (chuckles nervously)
Sure, when you hit the acid, be sure to plug your nose and hold your breath.
(eagerly observing the wreckage Truman caused) Look what Truman X did to my headquarters!
(sadly) Yes. I'm sorry, too.
It's... awesome!
(on Truman) He reminds me of myself at that age. Only his mom didn't make him take accordion lessons. (beat) True- true story, right over here.
(baffled) Accordion lessons?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The X's pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.