(patting Jimmy Bond; sarcastically) Cheer up, Gomer - You're bringin' the whole room down.
S9 E15Jump the Shark
(sighs) So, you're too broke to publish, huh? Pencil neck told me.. It's a shame. This little rag always was such a hoot. I'm gonna miss it. But, hey, the world spins on, right? Maybe saving it is a younger man's game. Or a woman's. (motioning to Yves)
(considers) Maybe it is.. (turns to Byers) You gotta admit, Byers. It hasn't exactly been our year. And to top it all off, we screwed the pooch pretty good today. Maybe we should pack it in.
And do what instead? We never gave up. We never will. In the end, if that's the best they can say about us... it'll do.
Lone Gunman Newspaper Group. Byers speaking.
GProfessor Gillnitz
(grinning triumphantly, checking his watch) Now you have a minute forty.
[The three Gunmen stand still for a second, thinking. Frohike notices a fire alarm, turns to the others, and signals his intention.]
Guys?
[Langly and Byers look at the fire alarm, then at each other. They both agree.]
Whatever it takes.
S9 E17Release
Cadet Hayes? Rudolph Hayes? I'm Agent Doggett. This is Agent Reyes. (Hayes is smelling a dead arm; Doggett is confused) Is that part of the training here, Cadet - smelling body parts?
HHayes
This man's flesh smells of creosote... but his skin is soft. Untanned. He worked indoors. A hardware store, probably. The tear marks at his elbow go from left to right. He was broadsided in a car accident. His hands gripped the wheel so hard.. his thumb bone snapped on impact.
You determined all that just by looking at that arm?
HHayes
(stands, looks at them) I see things.
We came to thank you. Because of your analysis, we were able to work up a profile to catch the man who murdered those women.
HHayes
What's the profile?
White male, twenty-five to thirty-five, ex-military. Employed near the bars where he met.. (Hayes shakes his head) ..why are you shaking your head?
HHayes
The profile's wrong. Your killer is in his forties. A felon recently arrived from out of state. His parole officer thinks he's looking for a job. He already has one - working for organized crime. He's killed many people. He's going to keep on killing. (walks away)
(smiles) Kind of annoying, isn't he?
S9 E18Sunshine Days
What are you lookin' at?
I want to check somethin' out. (finds identical pieces of roof tile in the garbage can) Ah-ha. Hold this, please? (she takes the bag, he climbs up on the roof to see it's been re-tiled)Ah-ha.
Twice with the "ah-ha's."
(sigh) The roof's been patched. When I was inside, I knew I smelled fresh plaster.
So, are you gonna fill me in?
A - Eyewitness places the deceased inside this house just prior to the time of his demise. B - We found a fragment of roofing shingle at the scene of the impact. It would seem it matches the discarded piece you now hold in your hand. C - There's a hole in the roof, recently patched, this big around. Connect A to B to C.
Much in the fashion of, say, Daffy Duck or Wiley Coyote, the deceased shot straight up through the roof, flew high into the air and landed on his buddy's car? (skeptically) You're serious?
A to B to C. I gotta tell ya, I think I'm finally gettin' the hang of this job.
Well, why name himself after cousin Oliver? None of the other Brady's particularly liked Oliver. He was a self-described pest.
A jinx. Cousin Oliver, the Jinx. (Scully srhugs) ..Oh, so maybe I watched an episode or two.
Okay, so be it. Just tell me how this helps me bust him, and uh, I'm happy.
Well, I'm starting to hope that it doesn't come to that.
What do you mean?
Well, the power that this man seemingly possesses is extraordinary. It needs to be studied.
RDr. Reits
It could expand the scope of human knowledge. It could change everything.
It very well could. I mean, I've.. I've been working this unit for nine years now. I-I've investigated nearly 200 paranormal cases. We are due for some incontrovertible proof. I want vindication, for - for Mulder and.. for all of us.
One big question. Why "The Brady Bunch"? Seriously, you two are fans. Why are people still watchin' a 30 year old TV show?
Because.. they're the family everyone wishes they had. Loving parents, lots of brothers and sisters, everybody getting along.
They're the, uh, perfect family. And since Oliver didn't have one as a child, he... created one.
Sure, I'd buy all that. But in this case, why "The Brady Bunch"? Why not "The Partridge Family"? Why not "Eight Is Enough"? (to Dr. Reits) Where was Oliver when you first saw "The Brady Bunch"? He was with you, right?
RDr. Reits
He'd always insisted we watch it together every week I was there.
And the longer you two were together, the more his psychokinetic power faded, until finally it went away completely. Now, what do you think that was?
RDr. Reits
(slowly realizes) Because for the first time in his life, he was happy.
Because he was with you.
Well, what are you suggesting is the course of action, John?
A - Oliver's gonna die if he continues to use his power. B - his power goes away when he's happy. And C - you're the father he never had, and he loves you. A to B to C.
So close, Dana. I'm sorry you don't get your proof.
Me too. Well, maybe I've had it these past nine years. If not proof of the paranormal, then... of more important things. (looks at Oliver for a moment, then leaves)
Well, here's hopin' the TV stays off and he learns how to love the real world.
(smiles and takes his hand) I think you are getting the hang of this job.
S9 E19The Truth (1)
(After escaping Knowle Rohrer with help from Krycek's ghost) No! You're dead!
Go. There's others. (An alarm rings & Krycek vanishes)
GGuard
What are you thinking?
Where am I?
GGuard
Wrong answer! (hits the wall next to Mulder with a club) What are you thinking?
..I'm thinking about getting the hell out of here.
GGuard
Wrong.. answer! (He hits Mulder and walks to the door of the cell) No sleeping!
GGuard
What are you thinking?
About my son.. about his mother.
GGuard
Wrong answer! (He swings at Mulder and misses) What are you thinking?
What do you want from me?!
GGuard
Wrong.. answer! (He swings at Mulder again, they grapple before the guard throttles Mulder with his baton) I want answers, you hear me? I want answers! (he leaves)
You saw him? Mulder?
They've accused him of murder?
And they have him believing that he did it.
Of murdering who?
Knowle Rohrer.
Knowle Rohrer? It can't be. I watched Knowle Rohrer die.
He can't die. Knowle Rohrer's a super soldier.
(Skinner hangs up phone) Mulder side-stepped security at a facility known as Mount Weather - a place where they say our so-called shadow government is installed.
What about this murder charge?
Thirty government workers are ready to testify they witnessed Mulder push a military officer to his death.
Killing a man who can't be killed? (Scully begins to leave, Doggett turns to her) Where are you going?
..To beg mercy with the man upstairs.
Mulder.. Mulder!
(makes a smirking face) ..I smelled you coming, Clarice.
Oh.. Damn it, Mulder. It's not funny to see you putting on that act.
No, that is funny. What's not funny is what they do to you in here if you don't put on that act.
[They embrace, Skinner averts his eyes allowing them a little privacy]
(moves to hug Skinner) Come here, you big, bald, beautiful man.
The only thing you're going to be kissing, Mulder, is your sweet ass good-bye, with the trouble you're in.
Uh-huh, I kind of gathered that, right around the 50th brainwashing session. (he kisses Scully on the hand)
Mulder, why are they doing this to you?
They think they're preparing me for my trial - For my testimony.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The X-Files pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.