Clyde Bruckman quotes from The X-Files

Clyde Bruckman

Well, you see, that's another reason I can't help you catch this guy. I might adversely affect the fate of the future. I mean, his next victim might be the mother of the daughter whose son invents the time machine. Then the son goes back in time and changes world history and then Columbus never discovers America, man never lands on the moon, the U.S. never invades Grenada. Or something less significant, resulting in the fact that my father never meets my mother and consequently, I'm never born. (small pause for a moment) So when do we start?

Clyde Bruckman

You know, there are worse ways to go, but I can't think of a more undignified way than autoerotic asphyxiation.

Mulder

Why are you telling me that?

Clyde Bruckman

Look, forget I mentioned it. It's none of my business.

Clyde Bruckman

You're looking down. You stepped in a pie that's fallen to the floor. The killer comes up to you and... coconut cream.

Mulder

What?

Clyde Bruckman

The pie... eh, coconut cream, or, is it lemon meringue? I don't know, it's... not sure, it's, it's hazy. As long as you're looking down, he comes up with the knife and... banana cream! Definitely banana cream.

Scully

So, how do I die?

Clyde Bruckman

You don't

Clyde Bruckman

How can I see the future if it didn't already exist?

Mulder

Then if the future is written, then why bother to do anything?

Clyde Bruckman

Now you're catching on.

You've seen the things I've done, both past and future...

Clyde Bruckman

They're terrible things.

I know they are! So, please tell me... why have I done them?

Clyde Bruckman

Don't you understand? Haven't you figured it out, son?

Clyde Bruckman

You do the things you do because you're a homicidal maniac.

(smiles slowly) That...that does explain a lot, doesn't it?