(Malcolm is back from holiday in this scene, and he's having a warm and friendly chat with his loyal assistant, Sam.)
(happily) Good morning, good morning, good morning! I'm back! I'm sorry I left my sombrero at home, but here I am. What do you think of the tan, huh? What do you think of this shade? I call it "Custard Cancer." (Malcolm gets a delivery.) Oh, thank you very much.
Where did you go?
I went to, um, Easter Island. I thought I'd spend my time there re-chiseling all the statues, so that they'd look like Westlife. How about a coffee?
Oh, I've sent you a link to Andy Murray's website. There's, uh, something you should see.
Andy Murray's website?
(While Sam leaves Malcolm's office to get him a cup of coffee, Malcolm reads about the big news on Andy Murray's website...)
Andy says, "Just agreed to lead the government's Healthy Choices campaign. Eat, live, be well." Fuck a Pot Noodle.
(Uh-oh...)
Sam, prepare my horse. I ride – to DoSAC!
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