(looking at a newspaper story with the headline "Silly Tucker: Was web of filth spun by Downing Street 'Spiderman'?")
Malcolm (on the phone): The story isn't me, Glenn, OK? Nobody is interested in me and I'll be pleased if you'd remember that, OK?
Glenn (at his sister's Welsh cottage): You sure you don't want me and Hugh to come back? We could give you some cover.
Hugh is not coming back: it would look like we're panicking, and we're not panicking. But I need you back here fucking ASAP to let them know that we're not panicking.
So you want me to interrupt my holiday in a panic, so that Hugh doesn't have to interrupt his holiday and look like he's panicking?
You get back here! I wanna see you popping a bollock for me! (hangs up)
(walking in, holding up the same 'Silly Tucker' story) You seen this?
No, I haven't seen that. I'm the senior press guy for the Government of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. No, I don't look at the newspapers, that's fucking news to me.
All right, all right. What are we doing?
What are we doing? Fuck all, we're not doing nothing, all right, because I am not the story here.
Well, no, you kind of are the story, Malc: they spelt your name right and everything.
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