[Hugh and Glenn are in the car listening to The World at One. They're celebrating Hugh's "Snooper Force" policy being given the green light.]
[on the radio] The World at One. This is Nick Clarke with 30 minutes of news...
Well, you can fuck off for a start.
The Social Affairs Secretary Hugh Abbot...
[quite proudly] Evening!
First story up.
Top of the bill.
...a uniformed, so-called Snooper Force. The announcement suggests the DSA has pushed the Treasury into releasing more funds, so we'll ask, is the Treasury losing its...
Yes it is, and not before time!
...Social Affairs spokesman Mark Davis Nathenson...
If you can get him out of the bath!
But first, the estimates of fatalities from yesterday's train disaster in Bangalore have risen precipitously overnight...
Well, that's marvelous.
[But then, Hugh's cell phone rings.]
Oh, Tucker. [Happily answering the call] Malcolm.
What the fuck was that? Was this whole Snooper Force thing from you?
Malcolm, I talked to the PM and this is completely kosher as far as he's concerned. You know, he gave the go-ahead and he said, you know, bounce the Treasury.
Don't you realise? We have got 17 different issues we are fighting with the Treasury about.
I can hear that you are, as usual, upset.
I'll tell you why I'm upset. I'm upset because these fucking morons over at the Treasury, these people, they are so paranoid. If you don't tell them about stuff like this, if you don't even cc them an email, they think you've started a palace coup!
Mal– Malcolm –
You don't seem to understand that I'm gonna have to mop up a fucking hurricane of piss here from all of these neurotics! What did the Prime Minister actually say to you?
He actually said, 'This is exactly the kind of thing we should be doing.'
What did he actually say?
He said, 'This is exactly the sort of thing we should be doing.'
'Should' be doing. 'Should' does not mean 'yes'. Now, there's only one thing to do here, and it's what I'm going to tell you to do. Kill it.
I can't -- I can't kill it! I'm on my way to make the announcement! There's gonna be television cameras there and everything!
Well, fuck the television cameras! Think of something else to say! But just don't mention the bloody New Avengers or the Snooper Force, or whatever the fuck you call it.
Scam Busters?
Get rid of it. I don't wanna hear about it again. Bye.
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