Chief Wiggum, Archbishop McGee, distinguished guests, I am pleased to dedicate this emergency warning system. In the off-chance of a nuclear disaster, this sign will tell you, the good citizens of Springfield, what to do!
SSign
[lights up] RELAX. EVERYTHING IS FINE.
CCrowd
Ooh! [strong applause]
SSign
MINOR LEAK. ROLL UP WINDOWS.
CCrowd
Oh. [moderate applause]
SSign
MELTDOWN. FLEE CITY. [weak applause] CORE EXPLOSION. REPENT SINS.
[Entire crowd stares in stunned silence, save for Homer, Carl and Lenny, who snicker at that sign]
Joke's on them. If the core exploded, there wouldn't even be any power to light that sign!
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