The Office (US) · Season 1, Episode 3
“Health Care” · Season 1, Episode 3
In this episode: Dwight Schrute (2), Jim Halpert (2), Pam Beesly (2), Michael Scott (1)
Wait, what are you writing? Don't write ebola or mad cow disease, all right? [Shows Pam his sheet; he has circled every disease on it] Because I'm suffering from both of them.
[Laughs] I'm inventing new diseases.
Oh, great.
So, like, let's say that my teeth turn to liquid and then they drip down the back of my throat. What would you call that?
I thought you said you were inventing new diseases. That's spontaneous dental hydroplosion.
Nice.
OK, first let's go over some parameters. How many people can I fire?
Uh, none. You're picking a healthcare plan.
Dwight, Don't you need health insurance?
Don't need it. Perfect immunity. I can raise and lower my cholesterol at will.
Why would you need to raise your cholesterol?
So I can lower it.
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