Bob Fossil quotes from The Mighty Boosh

Bob Fossil

[Addressing children] Why are you people so small? I can rest my drinks on your heads.

Fossil

I want everyone to mind their P's and Q's. That means NO effin' and Jeffin'.

Bob Fossil

Technically, you're not a Peeping Tom if it's one of your relatives.

Bob Fossil

Hey, Moon, who are you? Zorro on Gay Night? [Howard says nothing.] Nice comeback.

Fossil

The antipodian, masheeun, The Killeroo!

Howard

What's all that about, I didn't know anything about that.

Vince

Come on, it's just hype, you'll get the same treatment.

Howard

Will I?

Vince

Wait 'till you hear your introduction, come on [reassuring Howard]

Fossil

Aaaaand fighting the Killeroo: Howard Mooooooon [silence in the crowd]

Dixon Bainbridge

Make something up you prick, tell them he got eaten by the python.

Fossil

The who?

Dixon Bainbridge

The windy man, the long mover.

Fossil

Oh yeah...

Fossil

[Rubs nipple] What do you know about Tommy, Tommy's dead.

Howard

They never found Tommy's body, so under zoo regulation 409 subsection C, he's technically still the owner of the zoo and you can't sell it. Thanks.

Fossil

Oh yeah, well let me show you something, this is a contract, it said that Tommy owned the zoo, but in the event of his disappearance, after ten years, it reverts back to Bainbridge. Suck on that subsection.

Fossil

Well I got a problem with the black and white people at the zoo.

Howard

Who?

Fossil

You know, the black eyes Chinese people that eat sticks?

Howard

The pandas...

Fossil

[Doing impression of Howard] "Oh, I'm Howard Moon, I know how to read, I know all the animals names at the zoo" [Rubs Nipple] ...Yeah the pandas.