[talking quickly] Sam Valiant, Private Nose, at your service, check! The right nose in the right place at the right time! The Valiant nose strikes again and the case is solved! There's your culprit! [handcuffs Alvin]
Hey! I'm Alvin!
Sam Valiant does it again! Cough up the tape, boy, and let's be quick about it!
Stop, that's Alvin!
Definitely the criminal type, check. Low forehead, check, eyes too close together, sullen look, check.
That's Alvin! He's not the thief, he lives here!
Check.
Please remove those handcuffs.
[frees Alvin] You can't fool the nose, sir, check! [sniffs] Smells definitely like recording tape.
Mr. Valiant, this is a recording room.
Check.
It's full of tape.
Check.
Even I could smell of tape.
Check, confession is good for the soul, boy! Cooperate, and law will be lenient! Remember, anything you say may be held against you.
Listen, Sam, I wrote that tape!
Double incrimination! Wrote the tape and stole the tape! Charged on two counts!
Oh, no.
Leave Dave alone!
Yeah!
You've got a bum nose, mister!
That's a very unfortunate reference, boy! Never insult the nose! The eyes do not see what they think they blink, the ears are misleading, the feet go wrong, but the nose knows! The nose has heart, the nose has soul! Hail the noble nose!
Okay, Mr. Valiant, you have a splendid nose, now will you tell it to find my tape?!
Check.
More from this episode
All quotes from this episode →More The Alvin Show quotes · These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Alvin Show pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.