Hannibal Smith quotes from The A Team

Hannibal

It's always darkest just before it goes totally black.

Hannibal

(to Prince) If you don't take your hand off of me, your family will wear black.

Hannibal

If you lean on the Mayers once more you're gonna be shopping for some new kneecaps.

Amy

Excuse me, but what are you doing?

Hannibal

We're tying him up so he won't kill us if he comes-to.

I see. Excuse me again, but isn't he one of you, I mean isn't he on the team?

Face

Yes.

Amy

So then why do you have to drug him?

Hannibal

He hates the pilot.

Amy

Hates the pilot? Why?

Face

Because our pilot is insane.

So he's up there now, flying us?

Face

Yes.

Face

What a kidder!

Amy

I'm not sure you are exactly what I bargained for.

Hannibal

Let's get something straight right now. You want your friend back. The authorities shined you on, so you went out and hired a bunch of gun-fighters. Now, if you wanted someone with good manners, you should've hired an English butler.

Amy

The pilot's really insane?

Hannibal

We think so.

Amy

Are you still being chased by the government?

Hannibal

That's right.

Amy

What I don't understand, is why you're not living in Switzerland, where it's safe?

Hannibal

Because we're not Swiss. We're Americans. We've got a little problem right now. But we'll work our way out of it somehow. In the mean time, we stick together and do what we do best

Hannibal

The sleeping giant awakes.

Hannibal

How fast can you bring us down?

Murdock

You just landed, brother.

B.A.

I ain't going on no aeroplane!

Hannibal

What's this?

...living on the jazz. Four restless romantics...

Hannibal

Restless romantics?

...the edge of society, which is the only place left they can survive...

Hannibal

What's this, the last reel of a Disney movie?

Amy

I wasn't going to tell you guys...but I decided to do a story on you!

B.A.

I ain't goin' on no aeroplane!

Hannibal

Forget it lady. It ain't gonna happen.

Amy

C'mon guys, I know, I know. What you guys are doing is really important. You saved Al. And you caught the terrorists. Everybody's against you. The government is after you. You gotta hide. I think that's a hell of a story!

B.A.

I said I ain't gettin' on no aeroplane Hannibal!

Amy

I won't publish it until you've cleared yourselves.

Hannibal

You won't publish it, period! You think we're looking to become Book of the Month Club Celebrities? You gotta be nuts, lady!

Murdock

I'm nuts. Let's keep that straight. Okay? I got my whole room and board resting on that fact.

Hannibal

He's right.

Amy

B.A. was telling me about 'The Jazz' - and I think I caught the fever!

Hannibal

So?

Amy

So...you let me in - or I write the book...and blow your cover!

B.A.

I said I ain't gettin' on no aeroplane Hannibal!

Amy

C'mon guys, I can help you with lots of stuff! I have the paper; I have influence; I have a computer at the paper for research stuff...and I have the 1st Amendment to hide behind.

Hannibal

We'll talk about it on the aeroplane.

B.A.

I told you I ain't goin' on no aeroplane!

Hannibal

Ah, c'mon B.A., be a sport!

B.A.

Gotcha! I told you you weren't gonna get me this time sucka, no sirree!

Hannibal

Now B.A., you know I wouldn't try to fool you.

B.A.

Don't put no dogpile shuffle on me Hannibal.

B.A.

I...I...

Amy

Why'd he [B.A.] hit you?

Hannibal

Hit me? If he hit me, I'd be in the hospital.

The Lord shall test them! They shall walk through the valley of his wrath.

Hannibal

Now you're beginning to walk through the valley of my wrath, Preacher.

Hannibal

(holds up three fingers) How many fingers am I holding up?

Face

Blue.

Hannibal

Murdock, how'd I let you talk me into this?

Murdock

I don't know, I have intermittent memory loss!

'Course you realize when we run these prints thruogh we are gonna find out who you guys are.

Hannibal

I told you before, we're ballet dancers.

Face

That guy over at Doc's is our choreographer.

Hannibal

Yeah, we had a nasty audience. I don't think they liked our "pas the deux". Opened up on us from the first row with a .50-calibre machine gun.

B.A.

We're offline Hannibal, all four mics are dead!

Hannibal

[from behind a newspaper] Looks like they found them.

Face

Great, that means we've lost the edge. Up against guys like these that, that doesn't make me feel too good.

B.A.

Shut up, Murdock! Shut up!... I told you this plan stinks!

Hannibal

Murdock, B.A., take the right. Face, stay with me.

Face

Uh, Hannibal, if we're gonna fight, I'd really prefer to be teamed with B.A.

Murdock

Me too.

Hannibal

Are you guys saying you don't want to team up with me?

Yes!

Hannibal

Why?

B.A.

I'll tell you why. Because when you're on the jazz man, you're dangerous!

Murdock

Oh wow! You went to Hamburger Heaven! Home of Captain Bellybuster, America's Hero. Did ya get me a Bellybustin' Surprise Pack Hannibal, didja didja didja?

Hannibal

Ah, sorry Murdock. But...with 6 Tummy Tingler malts, look what you get free!

Murdock

A Captain Bellybuster cap! Out of the Blue I'm coming at you. Super Nutritious and Super Delicious!

What are you gonna do with us?

Face

Well, we were thinking maybe we'd tie you to a tree and leave you for the lions. They like a little snack at night.

Murdock

Yeah, the get the munchies, right after Carson.

Hannibal

Could try the old Indian trick.

Face

Stake 'em out over an anthill?

Hannibal

I've always liked it.

Face

Uh, I don't know. I'm not sure how I'd get the ants to go for these two.

Murdock

Oh, that's easy. Just stick an ice-cream con right in their pocket.

You guys are crazy.

Hannibal

Oh, he's crazy. We're just bad-tempered. Okay, start walking.

What, you are letting us go?

Hannibal

For now.

We'll never make it back on foot.

Hannibal

Try it on your hands and knees.