“Mutagen Man Unleashed” quotes from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012)

Raph

What the heck is this nonsense? It's terrible!

Mikey

Terribly awesome! I found these old tapes in a dumpster.

Leo

Tapes?

Mikey

Check it out.

Leo

Dude, this is awful. And you guys complained about Space Heroes.

Raph

Their lips don't even match what they're saying! I could NEVER watch a show this bad!

Raph

So she's the princess of an entire planet? Cool!

Mikey

Yep, and she also pilots the robot's left leg. She rules! But that scientist dude made the robot.

Donnie

The story has such an intricate, layered plot. Four stars!

[On TV] P-p-princess, I'd like to invite you for space dinner, if you please. Yes?

What, I, date a weakling like you? [walks away] Not for 10,000 Zarkon crystals!

Mikey

Donnie, that is so you and April, dude!

Donnie

IT IS NOT! This show is lame, anyway. The plot makes zero sense! [heads into his lab] I'll be in the lab.

Mikey

[after a stealth attack from Leo] What was that?

Leo

THAT, was a stealth attack. [eats pizza] And that is what we're gonna be doing in today's training session.

Mikey

No fair! I couldn't see you coming!

Raph

That's why it's called 'stealth', genius.

Donnie

Why would you eat a slice of pizza you found on the roof anyway?

Mikey

Roof pizza is like one of my top ten favorite types of pizza.

Splinter

Today, I will teach you to enjoy falling down.

Donnie

Why would I ever- [gets tripped by Splinter] Whoa!

Splinter

Did you enjoy that?

Donnie

No!

Splinter

Then let's keep trying. [knocks Donnie down a couple more times] Do you like it yet?

Donnie

No, sensei! Not at all!

Splinter

Hmm. Then perhaps one cannot make someone like something.

Donnie

Of course not. No one wants to be... [realizes what Splinter means] Oh, I get it. You're talking about me and April.

Splinter

My son, for someone so intelligent, the obvious often eludes you.

April

[faced with Mutagen Man] Donnie's monster?! Can't I go a MONTH without some mutant attacking me? [Casey gets in front of her] What are you doing?

Casey

Whatever that thing is, it's pure evil, and completely cool looking!! I'll handle this, sweetheart.

April

"Sweetheart"?