Louie quotes from Taxi

Latka

Louie, why don't you come and join the party?

Louie

No.

Alex

Hey Louie! You'd make us all feel miserable if you did.

Louie

Okay.

You must be Louie.

Louie

How did you know my name?

I only had three people described to me. One was smart, one was good-looking, and one was you.

Bobby

[talking on the phone with his agent about a possible acting role] Yeah I understand. Thanks for calling.

Tony

Oh, come on already, the suspense is killing me! Did you get it or not?

Louie

Banta, sometimes I wish you were smarter just so you know how dumb you are!

Reverend Jim

Ooh, there are a nice little surprise inside.

Louie

What are you talking about?

Reverend Jim

Well, I could be wrong, but I detect something in here that's a lot more powerful than oatmeal.

Elaine

Maybe I'm insensitive but I don't see what the problem is, you know, I can't imagine missing that sport.

Bobby

Elaine, boxing is Tony's life. I mean it would be like me if I had to give up acting.

Elaine

But when you act, no one gets brutalized.

Louie

Only the playwright and anyone trapped in the theater.

Louie

You see this yellow circle? See? What you need to do, is move it around with this stick, and eat up all the dots.

Reverend Jim

[starting forward; excited] Oh!

Louie

[stopping him] Wait, wait! There's more!

Reverend Jim

[amazed] MORE?

Louie

Yes! More! You see those monsters? These monsters chase you around the maze and they try to eat you.

Reverend Jim

[eyes bugging out] WHOA!

Louie

[struggling to hold the excited Jim back] Iggy, Iggy... easy now, you see- you see those flashing blue lights? Those are energizers, if you eat them, the- the monsters turn blue and if you eat them... you get points for eating them!

Reverend Jim

[shaking Louie, unable to control his enthusiasm] Please, boss! Please! Please!

Louie

[still struggling to hold Jim back] Boy! I love his enthusiasm!

Louie

Jim, your father is no longer with us.

Reverend Jim

He never was. He lives in Boston.

Louie

No, I mean, he's gone on to his final resting place.

Reverend Jim

A condo in Palm Beach?

Louie

You know how I have you haul those used parts to the junkyard and sell them for Mr. Ratledge?

Yeah.

Louie

Well, you didn't quite do it for Ratledge as much as you did it for me.

Louie

Okay, who wants a really good cab today?

Reverend Jim

I do boss.

Louie

Good, I'm glad you do Iggy. You know the rules now.

Reverend Jim

Okie doke. How much do you want?

Louie

$48,000.

Reverend Jim

Okay, but if I'm gonna pay that kind of money I want a cab with a heater.

Alex

Jim, you give a thousand bucks to Louie De Palma, you better be there to see that he gives it to somebody. Otherwise, he's going to pocket that money himself and lie about it.

Reverend Jim

Will you do that?

Louie

Of course.