Lucas quotes from Stranger Things

Lucas

[To Mike] I'm not gonna lie, it's gonna be bad. But you can fix this. It's just one little mistake. I've made hundreds, thousands. Max has dumped me five times. But what have I done? Huh? Have I despaired? No. I've marched back into battle, and I've won her back every single freaking time.

Lucas

[To Jason] I thought I wanted to be like you. Popular. Normal. But it turns out, normal's just a raging psychopath.

Lucas

[to Max] I wish I... I had better news. [machine beeps] Hopefully my next update will be something like El and Hop saved Holly, and killed Vecna, and everyone's back home celebrating and everything. But if I've learned anything over the years... it's never gonna be that easy. [somber music playing] El's amazing. But she can't do this alone. She's gonna need all the help she can get. She's going to need the Party, the full Party. Which is why I'm here. The final battle... I feel like it started tonight. And Max, we can't win this without you. If my theory is right, we're running out of time. So if you're planning on resurrecting anytime soon, now... now is the time. Even a sign would be enough to show me you're still in there. Online TV streaming services Please, Max. Please. Wake up. Just... something. I miss you.

Dustin

Guys, I really think we should turn back.

Lucas

Seriously, Dustin?! You want to run to your mom, be a baby, then go home already!

Dustin

I'm just being realistic, Lucas!

Lucas

No, you're being a big sissy!

Dustin

Did you ever think maybe Will went missing because he ran into something bad? And we're going to the exact same spot where he was last seen? And we have no weapons or anything?

Mike

Dustin shut up...

Dustin

I'm just saying; does that seem smart to you?

Mike

Shut up, shut up... did you guys hear that?!

Step right up, ladies and gentlemen. Step right up and get your tickets for the freak show.

Who do you think would make more money in a freak show? Midnight, Frogface, or Toothless?

[Mimicking Dustin] I'd go with Toothless.

Dustin

I told you a million times my teeth are coming in. It's called cleidocranial dysplasia.

[Mimicking Dustin] I told you a million times.

[chuckles] Do the arm thing.

Do it, freak.

God, it gets me every time.

Lucas

Assholes.

Mike

I think it's cool. It's like you have superpowers or something. Like Mr. Fantastic.

Dustin

Yeah, except I can't fight evil with it.

Dustin

Why do we need weapons? We have her.

Lucas

She shut ONE door!

Dustin

With her mind!

Mike

Just hold on a little longer, okay? He's gone, the Bad Man's gone. We'll be home soon, and my mom? She'll get you your own bed, and you can eat as many Eggos as you want. And... we can go to the Snow Ball.

Eleven

[Weakened] Promise?

Mike

Promise.

Dustin

Is it... is it dead?

Mike

Go, go go go go!!

Dustin

Get the wrist rocket, get the wrist rocket, now!!

Mike

Go go go go go! Get the rocks, get the rocks, get the rocks!

Dustin

Getting the rocks!

Lucas

Gimme one!

Dustin

Come on! Fire!

Mike

Kill it, kill it!

Lucas

Another one!

Dustin

Kill the bastard! Kill it now!

Mike

Kill it! Go go go go go!

Dustin

Get, get, get- come on, kill it, bastard!

Lucas

It's not working!

Mike

Hit him again! Keep going, keep going!

Dustin

Kill him! Get, get, get... come on, go, go, go!

Mike

Eleven, stop!

Eleven

[Sadly] Goodbye, Mike. [She turns to the Demogorgon] No more. [Both the Demogorgon and El scream as she uses her powers to rip it apart; Lucas, Dustin and Mike cover their ears. When the lights return, El and the Demogorgon have vanished]

Mike

[Repeatedly] El...?!

Eleven!

Mike

[Tearful] El! El, where are you?! Eleven?! El?!

Lucas

You're just not nimble enough, but you'll get there someday. But until then... [chuckles] Princess Daphne is still mine!

Dustin

You know, whatever. I'm still tops on "Centipede" and "Dig Dug".

You sure about that?

Dustin

Sure about what? You're kidding me, nonononono. Move, move! [He checks the top scores on "Centipede" and "Dig Dug"] Aw, no no no no no... NO! No! No...!

Will

Seven hundred and fifty-one thousand, three hundred points?!

Mike

That's impossible!

Dustin

Who- who's "MADMAX?"

Better than you.

Will

Is it you?

[Scoffs] You know I despise "Dig Dug".

Lucas

Then who is it?

Dustin

Yeah, spill it, Keith.

You want information? Then I need something in return. [Grins at Mike]

Mike

No. No, no, no, no way! You're not getting a date with her!

Lucas

Mike, come on, just get him the date.

Mike

I'm not prostituting my sister!

Lucas

But it's for a good cause!

Dustin

No, no, don't get him the date. You know what? He's gonna spread his nasty-ass rash to your whole family!

Acne isn't a rash, and it isn't contagious, you prepubescent wastoid!

Dustin

Still no sign?

Lucas

Jack shit.

Dustin

[Checks his watch] Aw, man, my Mom's gonna murder me!

Lucas

So go home, I'll radio when she comes.

Dustin

Oh yeah, nice try. You just want me out of here so you can make your move.

Lucas

Oh cause you're such a threat.

Dustin

That's right! She will not be able to resist these pearls. Grr...! [Spotting something] Ten O'Clock!

Lucas

What?

Dustin

Ten O'Clock.

Lucas

They're arguing! They're arguing!

Dustin

I I I see that! [About binoculars] I don't even know why you need those. God, you're so stupid.

Lucas

She's incredible.

Dustin

She's...

MAD MAX!

Billy

God, this place is such a shithole.

Max

It's not that bad.

Billy

No? [Buzzes down the window and holds his nose] Mmm, you smell that, Max? That's actually shit. Cow shit!

Max

I don't see any cows. [Buzzes the window up again]

Billy

Clearly, you haven't met the high school girls. So what, you like it here now?

Max

No!

Billy

Then why are you defending it?

Max

I'm not.

Billy

Sure sounds like it.

Max

It's just, we're stuck here, so...

Billy

Mm, you're right. We're stuck here. [Glares at her] And whose fault is that?

Max

[Under her breath] Yours.

Billy

What'd you say?

Max

Nothing.

Billy

Did you say it's my fault?

Max

No!

Billy

You know whose fault it is. Say it. [Pause] Maaax... say it. SAY IT!!!

Dustin

Really, everyone dressed up last year.

Max

Billy, slow down.

Billy

Oh, these your new ape-friends?

Max

No! No, I don't know them.

Billy

Oh, then I guess you won't care if I hit 'em then, huh? I get bonus points, I get 'em all in one go!

Max

No, Billy, stop, it's not funny.

Dustin

Uh, guys...!

Max

Billy, come on, stop! This isn't funny! Stop!

Mike

Go, go, go, go!

Max

BILLY, STOP IT!

Dustin

Oh, shit shit shit shit shit...!

Billy

[Laughs maniacally] WHOOO! That was a close one, huh?!

Dustin

Was that...

Lucas

Madmax!

Dustin

His name is D'Artagnan. pPicks it up] Cute, right?

Mike

"D'Artagnan?"

Dustin

Dart, for short.

Max

And he was in your trash?

Dustin

Foraging for food. You wanna hold him?

Max

No, no.

Dustin

He doesn't bite.

Max

I don't want to. [Dustin drops Dart into her hands] Oh, God, he's slimy!

Lucas

Ugh, he's like a living booger! [Passes Dart to Will]

Will

Oh, God, ugh! [Passes Dart to Mike, who stares at it]

Mike

What is he?

Dustin

[Grins] My question exactly. At first, I thought it was some type of pollywog.

Max

"Pollywog?"

Dustin

It's another word for tadpole. Tadpole is the larval stage of a toad.

Max

I-I know what a tadpole is.

Dustin

Alright, then you know that most tadpoles are aquatic, right? Well, Dart, he isn't, he doesn't need water.

Lucas

Yeah, but aren't there non-aquatic pollywogs?

Dustin

Terrestrial pollywogs? Yep, two to be exact. Indirana Semiplamata and the Adenomera Andreae. One's from India, one's from South America. So how did one end up in my trash?

Max

Maybe some scientists brought it here, and it escaped?

Mike

Did you guys see that? It looks like something is... moving inside it.

Dustin

Whoa. [He grabs Dart as it tries to escape] It's okay, it's okay, I got you, little guy. I know you don't like that, it's okay. [Looks up] And there's another thing. Reptiles, they're cold-blooded. Ectothermic, right? They love heat, the sun. Dart hates it, it hurts him.

Lucas

So, if he's not a pollywog, or a reptile...

Dustin

Then I've discovered a new species.

[Noticing Erica is using too much syrup] That's enough, Erica.

Uh-uh!

Dad?

[Reading his paper] Mm-hm?

When Mom's mad at you, how do you make her not mad?

[Sits down at the table] Hmm, that's a great question. How do you, hon?

[Not looking up from his paper] First, I apologize. Then, I get your mother whatever she wants.

Lucas

Even when she's wrong?

[Folds his paper down and looks at Lucas] ...She's never wrong, Son.

Lucas

[Telling Max about their adventure with Eleven] And that was the last we ever saw of her. After that, she was just, gone. I can't believe it's been that long. Feels like yesterday.

Max

[Sarcastically] Yeah, I mean, I bet. Wow.

Lucas

It's crazy, I know.

Max

It's crazy, but... I really liked it.

Lucas

Liked it?

Max

Yeah. Well, I, I had a few issues.

Lucas

[Confused] "Issues?"

Max

I just felt it was a little derivative, in parts, but-

Lucas

What are you talking about?

Max

[Sneers] I just wish it had a little more originality, that's all.

Lucas

You don't believe me.

Max

Lucas, come on. Seriously? How gullible do you think I am?

Lucas

Why would I make this up?

Max

I don't know. To impress me, or something? Or, you're just, like... insane.

Lucas

Angrily] I tell you all of this! I mean, top-secret stuff! Risking my life! And this is how you react?

Max

[Scoffs] "Risking your life?"

Lucas

Oh, so this is funny to you?

Max

Yeah. I mean... kind of funny. [Lucas glares at her, she gets up] Stupid... but funny.

Lucas

Where are you going?

Max

Story time's over, isn't it? [She walks back into the Arcade, Lucas follows her]

Lucas

What's wrong with you? I gave you what you wanted.

Max

I wanted to be a part of the group, not a part of some joke.

Lucas

It's not a joke.

Max

You did a good job, okay? You can go tell the others that I believed your lies, if it gets you "experience points" or whatever. [She tries to walk away, but Lucas grabs her arm]

Lucas

We have a lot of rules in our party, but the most important is, "Friends don't lie." Never ever, no matter what.

Max

[Sarcastically] Is that right? [Pulls the "Out of Order" sign off the Dig Dug console and slaps it on his chest] Then how do you explain this?

Lucas

[Sighs] I had to do that. To protect you-

Max

[Angrily] To protect me from who, exactly?! The big, bad government baddies from Hawkins Lab?!

Lucas

[Glancing around nervously] Lower your voice-

Max

Or, maybe it was to protect me from the "Demagorgon" from another dimension!

Lucas

Max, I'm serious, shut up!

Max

Oh, no, no, no! You know what it was? It was Eleven, the girl-

Lucas

[Clamps his hand over her mouth, leans forward and locks eyes with her] Stop talking. You're going to get us killed. Do you understand?

Max

[Pulls his hand down and stares at him] ... You're serious?

Lucas

I really wish I wasn't.

Max

...Prove it.

Lucas

I can't.

Max

So, what? I'm just supposed to trust you?

Lucas

Yes.

Mike

Did you guys know that Bob was the original founder of Hawkins AV Club?

Lucas

Really?

Mike

He petitioned the school to start it, and everything. And then he had a fund-raiser for equipment. Mr. Clarke learned everything from him. Pretty awesome, right?

Dustin

Yeah.

Mike

We can't let him die in vain.

Dustin

Well, what do you wanna do, Mike? Alright, the Chief's right on this; we can't stop those Demo-dogs on our own.

Max

"Demo-dogs?"

Dustin

Demogorgon, dogs. Demo-dogs. It's like a compound, it's like a play on words-

Max

Okay.

Dustin

I mean, when it was just Dart, maybe.

Lucas

But there's an army now.

Dustin

Precisely.

Mike

His army.

Steve

What do you mean?

Mike

[Holding up the drawing of the Shadow Monster] His army! Maybe if we stop him, we can stop his army too.

Lucas

[About Eleven and Mike] They do this every time!

Max

It's romantic!

Will

It's gross!

Dustin

It's bullshit!