Boabby quotes from Still Game

Boabby

How does this sound; I'll worry about my bar, and you two worry about if you're gonna make it through another winter?!

Boabby

Hey! Look! It's Lambert and Butler!

Jack

Shut it, Boabby. You're the only fag in here.

Boabby

Oh look who it is, Batman and Robin!

Victor

We'll accept that, as long as you go as Catwoman, ya pussy!

Victor

Jack and me are going back to school.

Boabby

Its Jack and I.

Jack

No, its me and Victor.

Boabby

I'm no' gonnae tell yous again. Keep it doon.

Winston

What's the matter with you?!

Boabby

You're annoying my customers.

Jack

Ah, shut up. We're your bloody customers and all!

Boabby

You're no' customers. Customers buy drink. Yous have been sitting there nursing them since yous came in here.

Victor

Cannae play cards steamin', Boaby, must remain focused.

Boabby

Oh, I'll focus you. Right oot the door.

Jack

Ah, now, Boaby, that's garbage patter. "Focus you oot the door"? You cannae just take a word, right, and slip it into a sentence and pass it off as excellent patter. You see, you've gotta be clever with it. For instance...

Victor

I don't know, something like "I'll focus my boot on your arse!"

Jack

See, that's good.

Winston

Aye. [gives Boaby the middle finger] "Focus on that, you old duffer!"

Jack

That is cruder but still as effective.

"Away and take a flyin' focus to yourself."

Nah.

Victor

Doesnae work, that, Eric.

Boabby

Look, I could lose my licence. You shouldnae be playing cairds in here.

Winston

Cards, Boaby, we're playing cards, no' 'cairds'. Cairds is what you play cards wi'.

Boabby

Just... keep it doon.

Boabby

[as Winston limps in] Oh dear, if it isnae Long John Silver!

Winston

If I was Long John Silver, you'd be first to walk the plank, you wank!

Boabby

One more thing.. don't take ANY pish off them. I never do.

Hullo Boabby. You look like a prized wanker.

Lager, Boabby!

Boabby

Shut yer hole, ya dick!

Boabby

[as Jack, Victor and Winston enter] Oh look who it is, Huey, Dewey and Louie.

Jack

Who?

Boabby

The Disney characters.

Jack

Oh right, aye. Well get us three pints, you goofy bastard!

Boabby

Oh look, it's Bill and Ben!

Victor

Two whiskies, you flobadobbing knob end!