TV show quotes
That man is a sworn enemy of the state! And of your son, Prince John!
Alas, one can choose one's friends but not one's family. You and John deserve each other.
Then "alas", you shall never leave England alive.
Are you always this odious or have you just practised for me?
Oh, you haven't seen the half of it!
[Legrand closes the hatch in the door that the Sheriff was speaking through]
[The gang, Legrand and his men and Queen Eleanor are trapped underneath Barndale Church by the Sheriff - as him ad his men are outside the door]
Thats the only way out of here.
Oh, here we go again!
[To Eleanor] GET DOWN AND STAY DOWN! Milady.
Well, come on, Big Bear!
[After Will, Djaq and Legrand's men arrive to help the gang fight the Sheriff and his men]
Why is nothing ever SIMPLE?!
[After Gisborne and Allen faked the Nightwatchman's escape]
Good news, Gisborne - only good news. Tell me you have caught him. Tell me you're ready to string him up. Tell me I can have my execution!
He escaped. The Nightwatchman is gone.
[furious] You have failed me again...! [smacks Gisborne, then holds a dagger to his neck] I WILL NOT TOLERATE INCOMPETENCE!!! There is too much at stake now! A KINGDOM!!! Last chance, Gisborne.
[The Sheriff storms off, while Gisborne returns to his duties; Marian watches, stunned]
Poor Legrand.
We'll see to it he gets a proper burial. Don't worry.
He was a hero. As are you [She looks at Much, Will and Djaq] all. King Richard will know of your service and sacrifice in helping me.
[Eleanor throws a bag of money to Robin]
My contribution.
Your majesty, I can't take this.
Why not? I am rich, the poor are poor. [She smiles] Isn't that where you come in?
[She leaves with Legrand's men, and as she does so, Robin, Much, Will and Little John bow]
[Gisborme and Allan visit Marian after they faked the Nightwatchman's escape. Marian smiles. Allan is holding the Nightwatchman's outfit]
Guy.
[She smiles]
You're safe.
[To Gisborne] You did this for me?
[She smiles]
Er... [Allan points to himself]
[Laughing] So, both of you.
[She smiles]
Well, what's getting chased by angry soldiers between friends, eh?
[Marian laughs]
[To Allan, regarding the Nightwatchman outfit] Burn that. [To Marian] The Nightwatchman is no more. You will not get another chance.
I've heard that one before.
[Marian laughs]
No-one asked for your opinion, you can go.
[Marian walks over to Allan and hugs him and he laughs]
[Quietly] Thank you.
[They stop hugging. Allan is smiling]
You saved my life.
[They smile at each other and Allan leaves]
[The gang are walking through a field]
There's something about Sherwood.
It's home.
Yeah.
[Much falls down]
Oh!
[The gang laugh]
[To Much] Come on!
[Much stands up]
I know a lot of people who would be very grateful of Queen Eleanor's money.
[He runs ahead]
[Djaq runs up to Little John]
So, John... do you think you'll be visiting Aquitaine any time soon?
The Queen Mother fancies you!
Big Bear!
[Little John tries to run away from the gang but they chase after him]
You're jealous!
[Robin jumps and gives John a little kick]
[Robin and Much grab John]
Get off!
[Robin, Much and Will push Little John to the ground. Djaq laughs and Will, Much and Robin stand up. Djaq continues to laugh]
[The gang led by Much are running to the barn in Nettlestone]
Come on! This way! Quick! Girl in distress!
What distress?
[Much opens the barn door and gestures to Robin to enter the barn.
Go!
[Robin enters followed by the rest of the gang. Robin doesn't see a girl in distress]
Where's the girl?
The girl is the pig! [He gestures to a pig roasting on a fire, with George cooking it], the pig is your present! This is a party! [Robin smiles] Happy Birthday!
Yeah!
Happy Birthday!
[Robin hugs Little John and Djaq]
Well, why here? Why not have it in the forest?
There's gratitude for you. Because then it wouldn't be a surprise!
[He playfully punches Robin in the stomach]
And besides, the people of Nettlestone can join us and you know... say thank you. Speaking of which, where is everyone?
They couldn't make it. And neither can I.
What do you mean they couldn't make it?! It's Robin Hood's birthday!
Sorry.
Sorry for what?
[George quickly opens the barn door, closes it and runs]
George?!
[Robin walks over to the closed barn door]
Oh, Much.
What?
[Robin looks through the gaps in the barn door and sees mercenaries arriving]
[George runs over to the mercenaries and Ellingham throws him a bag of money]
Thank you!
[George runs away]
[Shouting] Happy Birthday, Robin Hood!
Who's that?
That's Ellingham.
[Shouting] The Sheriff sends his best!
The leader of the Sheriff's mercenaries.
Not to mention...his best men!
[The mercenaries cheer]
Much!
[Robin turns to look at Much]
[Holding his arms out. Shouting] Sorry!
That bought us some time. We need to think.
There are five of us. And a hundred of them!
Once a few determined Spartans held a pass against a vast Persian army.
Really?
[Robin slightly nods]
Strategy.
And they lived?
No, but... they did well.
Oh.
I hate that story too.
If you go along with treason, you're committing treason.
Rubbish! If you go along with farting, doesn't mean you farted yourself, does it?
[Marian looks puzzled. Allan walks away. Marian turns to Allan]
What's happened to you?
[Allan turns around]
I've learnt which side my bread's buttered on.
[After scaring the Sheriff's mercenaries with a hogshead full of black powder]
Ha! Ha!
Black powder, Djaq? [Djaq nods] I thought I told you I never wanted to see that again!
[shrugging] I disobeyed you.
[Robin smiles]
Good! Do you have any more?
None.
Ah, news from Nettlestone! Nice? Nasty? Both? [chuckles]
Small problem...
[Cut to the War room; the Sheriff bursts in angrily, followed by Gisborne and the Messenger]
"EXPLODING FIRE"?! WHADDAYA MEAN, "EXPLODING FIRE"?!
Black powder.
Yes, I know what it is.
We want permission to burn down the barn. They'll be toast.
[irritated] Are you deaf? I told you: I want Hood's pretty little face, on his pretty little head, attached to his pretty little body, ON A PRETTY BIG SPIKE OUTSIDE MY CASTLE!!!
Then what do we do? He's got food in there for a week.
I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO, I DON'T CARE HOW LONG IT TAKES!!! BRING ME HOOD'S BODY ON A SPIKE!!!
So, you want to save England single-handedly?
No! But I can't find Robin!
Sorry, you're out of your depth.
No, I'm sorry.
[She punches Allan, knocking him out]
You underestimate me.
[She takes Allan's sword]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Robin Hood pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
