For the last time, Charlton Heston was not gay!
Oh, please! He wore a skirt in every picture he was in!
I heard the original title of Ben Hur was Ben Gay! [Laughs]
All S1
S1 E15Unfinished Business
KKKu Klux Klan Member
Are you doing something Queer in there?
Yeah, your son is giving me a lap dance.
[Attempting to disguise his voice] I was just wondering how much rat poison it would take to kill an old lady. I've already added a lot, and so far she just seems to like that taste!
[Bipolar Bear is told by the aliens they will just drop him off]
What? No anal probe?
AAlien
We... don't really do that.
Come on! You're not going to give me the anal probe? I'm missing Rosie for this!
AAlien
Very well... prepare the... anal probulator...
A1Alien 1
We can take a more pleasing form [Transforms into a Barbara Eden-esque woman]
You are way off!
A2Alien 2
You're gay, aren't you?
A1Alien 1
Why are the good ones always gay?
NNarrator
So after a quick stop at the local rubber tree, Queer Duck and Openly Gator attended to the task at hand...
[Motioning to Bipolar Bear's butt] You first!
No, no. Age before beauty!
That was so embarrassing, you got us kicked out of Wiener Dog.
I just assumed it was a gay bar.
You think everywhere is a gay bar.
Santa Claus is bi, my oh my!
SSanta
There's nothing that I won't try!
So lets all cheer, 'cause Santa's queer!
AAll
[Singing in Harmony] Santa Claus is gaaaaay!
SSanta
Queer Duck, you shouldn't say things about people if you don't know them!
So... you're not gay?
SSanta
I am all things to all people!
So you're bisexual?
SSanta
Ho ho ho! Exactly!
I love mardi gras, even though I don't know what it is.
It's french for "Everybody's Gay."
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Queer Duck pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.