Bark Captain, we’re sinking fast! Abandoned ship to all in its puppy fire furry!
I think the Bath-O-Matic has some few more adjustments.
Ahh! We’ve been hit by enemy fire!
Oh! This never happens when Nose Marie gives baths.
Nose Marie Day
Mommy Dearest, come and see. I watered unfertilized your new plant. Look at it now! Lookie, lookie, lookie!
(meows)
Oh, that is adorable!
Puppies, puppies, puppies! (licks and slurps) I love puppies!
Oh. This pampered life is boring.
Oh. Sounds like a certain sleepy head needs a nap.
(yawning) Yeah, but I can’t fall asleep with a bedtime story.
Then your all sit right back and listen, Freddie. Bedtime stories are my specialty. “Once Upon a little old Time…”
Stop! Don’t say another word.
What?
It’s your day off, remember? We’re doing all your chores for you.
Including bedtime stories.
(pushing Nose Marie to the door) So go relax, Nose Marie.
Oh, fiddly dee! This relaxing is becoming downright exhausting. (sighs)
But who’s going to tell me a story?
(as an old man) The little old storyteller me. Oh, Freddie, my pup. Did I ever tell you about the time I barked at a kitty? Uh, no. I mean a tiger… No, no, no. Was the cat monsters from Mars?
Never.
Oh, by cracking! (imagining he was soaring across the milky way in his ship) Them on days. Well, there I was soaring across the street. No. The milky way. When suddenly, they attacked the monster cats. They bombarded my ship with giant killer furballs. Of course, I put up a food fight.
Take that, and that, and that! Oh, by cracking the fur was really flying. Yes, free! Oh, I thought it was a goner.
You’re all gonna be goners if you don’t clean up this mess and pronto.
Sure thing, Cooler. Sorry.
This never happens when Nose Marie tells the story. (hoovering up the feathers) I wish Mother’s Day was over.
Yeah. Then Nose Marie could clean up this mess.
Oh. The little dumpling. How’s every little old thing? Can I do anything for ya?
No. Everybody’s taking great care of me.
Oh.
Who are you anyway?
Oh, I’m just a little old nobody.
Well, I’m obviously not needed around here anymore. So I’d best go somewhere where I am needed. (to Puppy Power) Puppy Power, let me see. A loving master just for me.
LMLisa’s Mom
The movers are almost finished, honey.
LDLisa’s Dad
Then let’s get packed with a plane to catch. California, here we come!
LMLisa’s Mom
And Lisa, our new home has a great big backyard, so you can finally have that puppy you’ve always wanted.
LLisa
A puppy?! Oh boy, I can’t wait.
And you won’t have to wait, cos this puppy’s coming with you.
So long, Pound Puppies!
I dug the stinky yucky gunky hole. Nice and deep, Mommy Dearest.
Puppies!
With my Puppy-Eating Plant guarding the plant, no mongrel will ever escape again!
Puppies! Puppies! I love puppies!
Whoa! That is one jumbo economy-sized vegetable.
AAll
(groaning) Oh.
Well, it’s been a long day, riding the range partner. And those cow pups are plumb. Dog-type took her out.
Which mean we’re bushed. How does Nose Marie do it every day?
Beats the fleas out of me, but we have puppy proof of how important Nose Marie is to us. So let’s go tell her.
That might not be so easy. Nose Marie is gone!
AAll
What?
She left a note. (reading) Dear gang. I’ve gone to get myself adopted. I just hope my new master likes me.
LLisa
Like her? I love her. She’s the most wonderful puppy ever.
LMLisa’s Mom
Well then, I guess we’ll just have to take her to California with us.
LLisa
Alright!
(barking squeakily)
LDLisa’s Dad
Come on, Lisa. We don’t wanna miss our flight.
(reading continuously) If all goes well, I’ll be flying to California today. I missed you all, but at least I’ll be with someone who needs me. Love Nose Marie.
(howls) This is awful. Nose Marie doesn’t think we need her.
Boy! Is she wrong?
And she’s leaving on a plane for California! Oh, what do we do?
We have to stop her. Pound Puppies, let’s start pounding!
Follow me, crew!
Puppies!
Puppies! Puppies! I love puppies! (picking them up)
Stop it, you overgrown ruta eater! Put them down!
Puppies!
(singing) The icky-poo puppies are gonna be munched! Gonna be munched! Gonna be munched! The icky-poo puppies are gonna be munched! The plant has caught them all!
Eat your puds off us, you overgrown salad bar!
Oh! Now I know why you should eat vegetables, so they eat you!
Oh, I just love little puppies! Love them, love them, love them!
Well, what do you know? He does love puppies. (laughs)
What?! You’re supposed to eat them, not love them, you-you weed!
The only things I eat are people and kitty-cats who are mean to puppies!
To the airport-a-rooney and step on it!
There are some things that even I won’t eat! Ugh!
FRFlight Recorder
Will all passengers please fasten your seat belts and prepare for take-off?
LLisa
Are you all ready to go, Nose Marie?
As ready as I’ll ever be, Lisa.
FRFlight Recorder
Flight Niner five to Los Angeles requests our clearance for take-off.
P1Pilot #1
Oh, hold the phone, Flight Niner five. We have unauthorized personnel on the runway.
P2Pilot #2
Correction. We have unauthorized dogs on the runway.
(howls)
(Imitating siren noise) Hey! Pull over!
FRFlight Recorder
There’s going to be a short delay, folks. We have a bunch of dogs blocking our take-off.
LLisa
Dogs?
Howler?
What are you all doing here?
Nose Marie! Don’t leave us, kiddo! I need you!
HBHowler, Bright Eyes and Whopper
We need you!
The puppy pound just wouldn’t be the same without you.
I missed you, southern fried goodness!
Absitively posolutely!
LLisa
Nose Marie, what’s going on? Oh. Is Nose Marie your dog?
Well, kind of. You see, we really need her help with the pound.
Well, how about another puppy who’s just as nice and cute? Hi. My name’s Freddie.
LLisa
Oh. Freddie, you’re perfect.
LFLisa and Freddie
Thanks, Pound Puppies!
Another happy adoption.
And it’s all thanks to you, Nose Marie.
AAll
You’re the greatest!
That’s the best little old Mother’s Day present of all!
Snow Puppies
Whoa. The only way to beat this heat is to think cool thoughts. Like cooler is cool, ice is cool, the lagoon is cool.
I’m really sick about poor little old Thunderhawk.
He’s drinking more water than the otter. He can’t stand the heat!
What’s the temp up to now, Whopper?
It’s a hundred… a thou… No. A mid-air of core diamond degree!
Hya!
Howler, can you tell us why the heat is hitting Thunderhawk so super-duper hard?
(howling) The Computer-Pupter should give us the answer.
CPComputer-Pupter
Thunderhawk’s problem is, he’s hot! He’s hot! He’s hot!
We know he’s hot, but why is he hotter than the rest of us hotshots?
I think I have the answer. (looking at the book) It says here. Thunderhawk’s the Siberian Husky. These dogs thrive best in a cold climate. They love ice and snow.
Then what we have to do is get this puparoo a master with an igloo.
Puppy Power, do your stuff. Find a place that’s cold enough.
(to Thunderhawk) A master with a freezing home. Someplace maybe north of Nome?
Where’s Nome?
In Alaska, same time zone is Santa Claus.
OOran
Hey, Nahook. Nice sled! You gonna be in the race on Saturday?
Nah. I still don’t have a dog. How can I race?
OOran
Well, maybe you can pull the sled yourself. Ha, ha, ha, ha!
Very funny, Oran. (sighs)
I can be Nahook’s sled dog.
And Nahook could be your new ever loving master.
Together, we can win any race.
Pups and puppets, we’re snowbound hounds! Alaskey, here we come!
(sighs) I’m miserably hot. The only comfort is knowing those mutts so suffering more than I am.
Eww! I don’t think so, Mommy Dearest. Look!
Good luck, Pound Puppies!
Thanks, Holly!
Stop those mongrels!
Oh, blast it all! They’re getting away!
(sniffs) Mommy Dearest, did you smell something? I think someone is having a cookout.
No, Brattina dear. It’s the smell of our bare feet sizzling on the hot pavement.
AAll
Whoa!
Air mailing ourselves to Alaska is a super-nifty idea, Cooler!
But, kids, please, don’t try this at all.
I just hope I haven’t already seen the inflight movie.
(Off-screen) There they are!
AAll
Uh-oh!
Those walking float mongrels won’t get away from me! Grab them!
Let’s hit the friendly skies, guys!
Gotcha! No! Let go of me!
Take your gunky hands off me! Eww! Icky!
(meows)
No! Get me out of here! Let me out I say! Where are we going?!
Oh! I’m freezing. And tha-a-at’s all the bunch of those c-c-c-crooked c-c-c-canines. Those mutts drive me nuts!
Come on, Catgut. We have to go far with Mommy Dearest.
(meows)
Star light, star bright. First star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might. Have this wish I wish tonight. I wish I had a dog to pull my sled to victory.
Ho ho ho! Ho ho Idaho!
Who in the world are you?
I’m Santa Whopper, and I bought you a present.
Hi. My name is Thunderhawk. You need a sled up for the big race?
Do I? You bet!
And I’m your pup. (he licks Nahook)
Aww! Thunderhawk finally has a loving master to care for him!
Now listen, Thunderhawk, I want to win that race tomorrow.
You got it, Nahook!
Great! We’re gonna leave Oran in the slush.
Whoa. Looks like winning a race is the only thing those who care about.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Pound Puppies (1986) pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.