Ziva: I'm not working. Just... drinking. Heidi! Uno mas, s'il vous plait.
Michael Locke: You're mixing your languages.
Ziva: And my liquors.

Ziva: I've learned from Gibbs that in certain cases you can attract far more bees with honey��
Tony: Flies.
Ziva: What do flies have to do with honey?
Tony: Flies... don't like... vinegar.
Ziva: Vinegar?
Tony: It's complicated. Here he comes.

Ziva: If you value that hand, I suggest you back away, slowly.

Ziva: Just to be clear, are there any more of these rules I should be aware of?
Gibbs: About fifty of them.
Ziva: And I don't suppose they're written down anywhere that I could--
Gibbs: No.
Ziva: Then how am I supposed to--
Gibbs: My job is to teach them to you!

Ziva: Lions and spiders and bears, oh my!

Ziva: Look. If you're going to give me a lecture on my bad judgment, I don't need to hear it.
Gibbs: Is that what this is about? You doubting your judgment?
Ziva: I should've moved earlier.
Gibbs: You would've if you could've.
Ziva: I left it too late.
Gibbs: You still took him out.
Ziva: I almost died.
Gibbs: But you didn't. You've got to trust your judgment, Ziva. Moment you don't, it won't be "almost."

Ziva: Looks like we found the murder weapon. Toy guitar?
McGee: That is not a toy guitar. That is a guitar controller. Used to play Lords of Rock, video game. That particular model is called an axe.
Ziva: So our killer is an axe murderer.

Ziva: McGee was specifically told to destroy those photos.
Tony: Guess he forgot.
Ziva: Then perhaps I should remind him.
Tony: Go easy on the lad, he's had a rough summer.
Ziva: Well, we all have.
Tony: I think it was especially difficult for McGeek. Doesn't handle change well, never has.
Ziva: He seems fine.
Tony: [scoffs] Please, cooped up in that techno-basement for four months? You know how much he loves pounding the pavement, working leads, interrogating.
Ziva: [laughs] McGee?
Tony: Yeah, not to mention Gibbs, Duckster, you and me, Abs... I mean, everyone knows how close those two are.
Ziva: McGee was in the sub-basement, Tony. They had lunch every week.
Tony: It's not the same. You get used to seeing someone every day, talking to them, relying on them, and suddenly they're not there...
Ziva: It's all part of the job.
Tony: Doesn't make it any easier... for McGee.

Ziva: My contact went through, Gibbs. The client Sean Oliver was protecting was...
Gibbs: Sean Oliver.
Ziva: Tony and McGee are picking her up.
Gibbs: Not bad, Officer David.
Ziva: Well, I do what I can.
Gibbs: When you see the director, thank her for me.

Ziva: Now, if you gentlemen will excuse me...
McGee: Where are you going?
Ziva: I've been locked in a box with Tony all day. The ladies' room!

Ziva: Oh, okay. I understand.
Tony: Understand what?
Ziva: You feel a little threatened now that Gibbs is back.
Tony: I do not!
Ziva: You have been whining like a little snitch all week!
Tony: The term is 'bitch'.
Ziva: I know. I was being polite.

Ziva: Red apples. That's good Amanda.
Tony: Breakfast is served, my lady a chocolate chip cookie [Amanda saying Thank you] and some hot cocoa.
Ziva: Your aunt will be here soon to pick you up.
Amanda: Thank you for helping me with my drawing, Ziva.
Gibbs: You are one brave little girl Amanda.
Amanda: Where's Mi - Shi? [walking over to window] What happened to your hand?
Gibbs: [Gibbs hands Agent Lee's badge to Amanda] Mi-Shi would want you to have that.

Ziva: Sergeant Haas comes back from Iraq, and the first thing he does is try to move in with a girl he's dated twice. Why?
Tony: He's a man.
Ziva: What does she have that he does not?
Tony: A bed.

Ziva: She asked if you had the calzones for this, yes?
Tony: Cojones.
Ziva: Do you?

Ziva: She knew.
McGee: Reads Gibbs like a book.
Tony: Short read, not a lot of dialogue.
Ziva: Your kind of book.
Tony: Are you suggesting I don't read?
McGee: I think she's suggesting you only look at the pictures, Tony.