A character in Nash Bridges
Played by Cheech Marin
Nash Bridges · 54 quotes
Most-quoted character in Nash Bridges: in 32 of its 54 quotes
Most scenes with: Nash Bridges (19), Barry Chen (3), Harvey Leek (2)
Joe Dominguez[as they sit in the dark in the hole in prison] Harvey?
Hey, Joe. We gotta get out of here.
Joe DominguezNo kidding. One little problem: it's a maximum security prison, remember?
I'm claustrophobic, remember?
Joe DominguezHey, don't worry, they'll come back. They got to come back to kill us.
That's comforting.
[to a suspect] Talk to me first; I'm easier and a hell of a lot cheaper.
Joe DominguezI'll vouch for that; he's cheap and easy.
Joe Dominguez[taking the dental packing out of his mouth, riding in Nash's car] That was the longest twenty minutes of my life outside my prostate exame.
'Scuse me - where you you thinkin' on putting that?
Joe DominguezI was thinking the ashtray.
[handing Joe a piece of tissue paper] Yeah, well, I'm thinking you wrap it in this until we pass a city trash can.
Joe DominguezYou okay? Want me to drive?
I'm in shock, I'm not insane.
Joe DominguezSee anything?
Yeah, there's a sale on Pauly Shore movies.
Joe Dominguez[motioning to a bus beside them that has a poster plastered on its side with a banner that says "Sex is Good. Safe Sex is Better."] Huh. That poster looks just like your daughter, bubba.
[surprised] That is my daughter.
Joe DominguezYou know, I wonder if Ingrid and I are gonna have, a little boy or little girl. You know what I mean? with a little boy you can, you know, kind of initiate him into the club, you know? With a little girl I think you spend most of your time kind of protecting her from the club, you know?
Oh, bubba - you are not wrong there.
[about Cassidy] Okay, where is she?
She stormed off to the library
Oh, she stormed off? And just what is it she has to be angry about?
Apparently she didn't like it when I found her condoms.
What condoms?
The ones she plans to use when she and Freddie have sex.
Joe Dominguez[looks uncomfortable] Um, you have anything to read?
On the coffee table.
Joe DominguezI'll be reading and, um, eavesdropping from over here.
I don't believe this.
Joe DominguezShould have had a boy, Nash man. Probably be buying him condoms yourself.
[laughs] That's true.
That is not true! That is not true.
[about Karen] But she does make the crime page.
Oh, yeah, she does.
That's good.
Yeah, she catches a lot of bad guys; big-time gang leaders, drug dealers, that kind of thing.
Joe DominguezSo, she's a good cop, huh?
[to Nash] Yeah, in Chicago she's like a female version of you.
Joe DominguezNo wonder I thought she was so sexy.
Oh, baby.
[about Karen, looking through the peephole] Well, she don't look like a cop. She looks like a supermodel.
Joe DominguezShe's Cindy Crawford. As a matter of fact, we're all supermodels. Come on, man, open the door.
Yeah, open it up - we're late for an S.I. swimsuit shoot.
Joe DominguezHey, Bettina, I haven't seen you since you got fired from the S.I.U.; heard you moved to Vegas.
I didn't get fired, I was downsized.
Joe Dominguez[after a girl gives Nash her number] Can't we go anywhere without chicks hitting on you?
Chicks don't hit on me.
Joe DominguezPlease, have you had an eye exam lately?
Stop it.
Joe DominguezI'd like to be able to flirt every once in a while.
Well, then, do it. There's no harm in it; you're married, not dead.
Joe Dominguez[holding out his hand and showing off his wedding ring] Are you kidding, man? I'm branded. That is chick repellant right there.
You know, Nash, I used to be a feared and respected cop in this town, remember?
Joe Dominguez[laughing] I don't know about the respected part, but I was sure afraid every time I went out with you.
[about Ingrid] Bubba, I am only going to say this five or six hundred more times: tell her the truth.
Joe DominguezI can't tell her the truth.
Why not?
Joe DominguezBecause I want to stay married, that's why.
If you want to find Tiger, this is where you'll find him.
Joe DominguezThis is a marijuana club.
I know. Totally legal under prop 215 as long as you have a valid medical excuse.
Joe DominguezFor what?
Weed. Pot. Dope. Marijuana. Grass.
Joe DominguezNo, I mean what's wrong with you?
Oh! Depression.
Joe DominguezDepression?
Yeah, I get really depressed when I'm not getting stoned.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Nash Bridges pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
