Shikamaru quotes from Naruto

Shikamaru

It really doesn't make a whole lot of difference to me whether I ever become a Chunin or not, but I guess maybe I shouldn't let myself be beaten by a female, so let's do it.

Shikamaru

[watching clouds] Ah, sometimes I wish I was a cloud just floating along, going wherever the breeze takes me.

Shikamaru

[Thinking as he prepares to sacrifice himself to help Sakura and Naruto escape] All I really wanted was to be just an average shinobi making an average living. I'd marry a regular girl who's not super pretty or super ugly, have two kids, a girl and then a boy, retire when my daughter got married and my son became a successful ninja, and then just spend the rest of my days playing Shogi or Go, a nice carefree and leisurely retirement, and then I'd die of old age before my wife. Yep, that's the life I wanted, and yet I ended up exerting myself. It's so unlike me. Even though I wanted to finish as just a regular guy, I had to go and get myself into this sticky situation.

Shikamaru

[To Choji after Ino leaves] She has no clue. Despite what most women seem to believe, men don't always go for the skinny girls. Most guys I know, they like girls with a little meat on their bones. It just looks healthier. Oh yeah, and the reverse is true too, you know. I'd bet anything she'd be twice as popular if she put on a few pounds instead of starving herself. She should eat.

Shikamaru

For as long as I've known him, Sasuke and I haven't exactly been close buddies. In fact I don't really like him at all. All the same, Sasuke's a ninja belonging to the Hidden Leaf Village. He's a comrade and I'll put my life on the line to help him. That's the way of our village.

Shikamaru

[To Tayuya] You'll have to excuse my bad manners. I'm not normally in the habit of slugging a lady. But then, looking at you, you don't really fall into that category, do you?

Shikamaru

It only takes one move for a checkmate.

Shikamaru

What a drag.

Kiba

Uh...can you say that again a little louder? Didn't quite catch that.

Shikamaru

You moron! Are you trying to get everybody in this place to hate our guts or what?

Sakura

NARUTO, YOU JACKASS! Why'd you always say something like that? YOU OBNOXIOUS LITTLE...!

I don't understand you guys, what kind of monster would attack their own teammate?

Zaku

I guess, monsters like us.

Dosu

You see, we don't play this game by your rules, it's not the scrolls we're after or even passing this test.

What then?

Dosu

Sasuke!

Shikamaru

[his shadow possession jutsu wears off] I hate it when it does that.

Dosu

So your paralysis jutsu has a pretty limited duration, I see.

Shikamaru

Shadow possession jutsu. Get your jutsu right.

Shikamaru

That Naruto is completely out of the loop.

Choji

So far out of the loop, he doesn't even know there is a loop.

So we mirror each other's movements, so what? A cute trick, but what do you gain by it?

Shikamaru

Man you're annoying. Shut up and watch.

You must be insane! If you throw that shuriken at me, you'll just be attacking yourself!

Shikamaru

Makes it kind of interesting, doesn't it?

You wouldn't! You couldn't!

Shikamaru

Yeah? Like a game of chicken, let's see who ducks first!

You're crazy!

Big deal! I'll do that too! [leans back, causing her head to crash into the wall behind her, knocking her out]

Shikamaru

And that's what I call using your head!

Gaara

A demon huh? My demon is as real as yours is. From my birth, my upbringing was not what most people would consider a happy one. To ensure that I became the strongest of Shinobi, my father had cast his ninjutsu on me, infusing my unborn self with the sand spirit. I destroyed the life of the woman who had given birth to me. I was born a monster. Its name is Shukaku and it's the living incarnation of an old monk of the Sand Village who'd been sealed up in a jar of tea.

Shikamaru

Yeah some kind of demonic jutsu. But to use it on a baby before it's even born? Man that's creepy.

Naruto

Could it be true? He's got one inside of him too?

Shikamaru

[sarcastically] Gee what a swell guy your dad must've been. He really must have loved you a lot.

Gaara

You speak of love? Don't measure me by your standards. Love. Family. The only emotional ties I have to my family are the ones I'd like to wrap around their necks. They're only ties of hate. Given life by the death of my mother, I was brought into being and nurtured as the salvation of the village. I was the Kazekage child. My father taught me the innermost secrets of the Shinobi. He pampered and protected me and left me to myself. For a time I thought that was love. And that was when everything started.

Shikamaru

When what started?

Naruto

What was it? Are you gonna tell us or not? So go on. What started? What was it?

Gaara

In the 6 years since I became 6 years old, my father tried to destroy me more times than I can count. [they shudder]

Shikamaru

You just finished saying how your father pampered and protected you. So which is it?

Gaara

Those who get to be too strong are apt to become feared. The jutsu that gave me birth had unbalanced something in my mind. Even the fools in my village finally realized I had emotional problems. My father the Kazekage had created me as his ultimate weapon. But I eventually became a threat to the very village I was meant to save. By the time I was 6, I became a figure of terror to the villagers. To them I was a relic of the past that they wished would disappear. So you see, I had failed at the one purpose for which I was given life. What then was left for me in this existence? Why go on living? For a long time I couldn't find an answer to that. But in order to live you need a purpose. To exist for no reason is the same as being dead.

Shikamaru

What is this guy talking about?

Naruto

I know just what he means exactly. He's... he's the same as me.

Gaara

Then in time the answer came to me. To put it simply my reason for living is in the killing of others. For years I lived in fear of those who were sent to murder me, but now I am at peace. I killed many would be assassins. And it was while I was doing it that the truth was made clear to me. I live solely for myself. I love only myself. As it was the death of my mother that first gave me life, now it is the death of others that sustains me. That makes me happy to be alive. And there's no end to it as long as there are still people to kill in this great wide crowded world.

Shikamaru

So why do I always have to fight girls? It sucks man.

Ino

Yeah, go Shikamaru! Use a super awesome technique on her and take that bitch down!

Shikamaru

[about his mother] From the second I wake up, it's nag, nag, nag...

[answering the door] Now who would be visiting us so early in the morning?

Shikamaru

Hey! Dad.

What is it?

Shikamaru

What on earth made you want to marry such a crabby woman like mom?

That's a good question. Even a crab like your mom can be gentle sometimes. She has her moments.

Shikamaru

[Slightly frustrated] That's the reason?