Michael quotes from My Wife and Kids

This beef stroganoff is really saying something.

Yeah, it's saying 'I'm meatloaf!'

What is my dress size?

The answer to your question is, your dress size is a six...

*giggling*

...teen!

Why does everyone think I'm the big green ogre?

Because you are.

I can't concentrate on my homework.

So you have to concentrate to bring home two D's and an F.

I'm cleaning out the closet.

With what, a bomb?