A character in Mike Tyson Mysteries
Marquees
Mike Tyson Mysteries · 23 quotes
5th most-quoted character in Mike Tyson Mysteries: in 3 of its 23 quotes
Most scenes with: Mike (3), Yung (2), Pigeon (2)
[reading the letter] OOO!
What's it say?
Just "OOO!" This mystery sounds fun!
[reads the letter] It doesn't say "ooo," those are zeroes. It's an old IBM computer punch card. It's written in binary.
Oh, for deaf people.
I think you mean braille, and that's for blind people, not deaf people.
So deaf people have no language? Wow. That's pretty sad.
No, they speak with their hands.
Like monkeys!
Sort of.
[about to smoke a joint] What?!
Michael, you can do this.
You can't live here anymore.
[chuckles] What?!
You can't live here anymore!
Is this about the pot? Because it's basically legal now.
No, it's not about the pot.
Is it about the video camera I hooked up in Yung Hee's bathroom?
[outraged] What?!
No, it's not that.
Is it because I put a roofie in her soda last night?
[even more outraged] What?!
Calm down, you didn't even drink it. I wasted a perfectly good roofie.
[facepalms] Ugh.
No.
Is it because I tried to take all those up-skirt pictures of Yung Hee?
When?
[under Yung Hee, using his phone as a camera] Right now. [takes a picture]
I'm not even wearing a skirt, you idiot.
Well, when you do, I'll be ready.
No, it's not that either!
WELL THEN WHAT IS IT?!
It's because...you're a disgusting filthy creature with mites all over you, and they're biting me, and I can't take it anymore!
Seriously?! You're kicking me out of your house because of your fucking bites?! You were the fucking heavyweight champion of the world, and now you can't stand a little itching?1 You can't put some fucking calamine lotion on there?! Well fuck you. Heh! I'm gonna go find a better place to live without a fucking shitty ghost.
Hey!
With a fucking hot Asian!
Ugh.
I thought you people were my friends. I hope you all die! [Pigeon walks out of the house]
Okay. Well, that went well.
[on the Mystery Mobile] P.S. [craps on the windshield of the Mystery Mobile]
I don't know; the price tag, and those stairs, made me very concerned.
We don't have to look at any more houses. This is the one. Mystery solved.
Well I think Caitlin has pretty good tits.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Mike Tyson Mysteries pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
