Jack Slattery quotes from Men in Trees

Jack

The humpback whale generally doesn't stay in long-term relationships. I know, it's like a typical guy... gets action and then moves on.

Marin

What is this?

Jack Slattery

Observation hut.

Marin

What are you observing?

Jack

I was looking for a nocturnal bear, but instead I found a relationship coach.

Marin

Almost as dangerous.

Jack

I'm not exactly sure what kind of date you're expecting for $13,000, but I was thinking picnic.

Marin

Oh, that sounds sweet, but I actually have some other ideas.

Jack

Okay. What do you got in mind?

Marin

Let's start with the bed.

Jack

The--the bed?

Marin

Could you uh, move it...back against the wall?

Marin

Can you think of a better way to celebrate this new chapter in our relationship?

Jack

We, uh, we have chapters?

Marin

Mm-hmm. Chapter one, 'strangers,' chapter two, 'sex'... chapter three, 'friends.

Marin

So you kinda do for animals what I do for people?

Jack

Well...you film people having sex?

Marin

I thought I made myself clear with the wood.

Jack

Yeah, you did.

Marin

I said I didn't want any romantic gestures, right?

Jack

Yeah, I know.

Marin

So you are just ignoring what I said?

Jack

Yeah, pretty much.

Marin

Wow, you got a lot of nerve buddy.

Jack

Only when it comes to stuff I really want.

Marin

Don't forget me!

Jack

I won't, certainly not after this.