Kiva quotes from Megas XLR

Kiva

My robot wasn't meant to be a toy for some prehistoric yahoo and his pet monkey thing!

Jamie

Monkey thing? MONKEY THING?! BLAST HER, COOP!

Kiva

[After Coop bested Kiva's mech with a spectacular wrestling move] My drones! I can't understand how you beat me.

Coop

Yeah...it kinda ROCKED. [Kiva looks at him] I mean, sorry about that.

Kiva

How did YOU get to be such a good pilot?

Coop

Well...[Flashback occurs. Mainly showing Coop sitting by the couch playing video games, he gets older, Jamie comes along and they both get older]

Jamie

Hey, uh, Coop. She's jacking your ride. [Coop shakes his head and snaps out of his reverie]

Kiva

Look at them all, these odds are awful!

Coop

You're right, it is kind of unfair. [knocks one of Kiva's automated drones] Now it's fair.

Coop

Who wants a burger? Or five?!

Jamie

[Sarcastically] Monkey thing, huh?

Kiva

[Dejected] I should've stayed in the future...

Magnanimous

We all know there's no way you can beat all of us and protect the subform here.

Jamie

SUB-FORM? Go get 'em Kiva, I got your back!

Kiva

[After both of them get captured] [sarcastically] Thanks for getting my back...

Jamie

[To Magnanimous] I wasn't doing anything! Hey, I don't even know her!

Kiva

First we need to run through all the systems.

Jamie

[Groans] But that could take hours.

Coop

Could. Won't. [Coop flies Megas into space and pushes practically all the buttons.]

Kiva

[After seeing the R.E.G.I.S. repeatedly regenerate after being physically beaten down] Just to reiterate: Smashing bad.

Jamie

You know, normally I'm pro-smashing, and I hate to agree with future-girl, but maybe smashing isn't the way to go this time.

Coop

We tried no smashing, and that didn't work. I'm sticking to my strengths...And smashing is my strengths. I just need to find the right way to smash him.

Kiva

Coop, forget it. It's just Television. The world can live without it.

Coop

[Coop imagines a bright happy world without TV where he is left as a pauper] No...I won't let that happen!

Jamie

Coop, you can stop eating now.

Coop

I ain't finished yet! [later] you know I'm still kind of hungry. You guys up for ice cream?

Kiva

How can you still be hungry after that...that horror show?

Coop

It takes many years of intensive training to cultivate this kind of refined appetite. [Flashback of Coop eating tons of food as he grows up] Many years...

Coop

Listen here, you walking water heater. YOU guys attacked me.

Jamie

Nope, that was you.

Coop

YOU screwed up my warp drive.

Kiva

You did that too.

Coop

AND you made me miss the monster truck comeback of the century!

Jamie

Again, all you.

Coop

Do ya mind? I'm on a roll here. Right! [Pause] What was I saying? Ah, forget it!

Coop

Man, now I really need another Big Glug... and a cheesesteak... or 28.

Kiva

Coop! You just destroyed the Glorft!

Coop

So? What'ya think was going to happen?

Kiva

We better go find him. Leaving Jamie alone with some innocent aliens isn't a good idea.

Coop

What's the worst he can do? [Imagines Jamie as the King of an alien planet, an alien presents him a fish as a gift, Jamie gets angry and presses a button labeled "NOT GOOD ENOUGH" causing the entire planet to explode] You're right we better find him.

Kiva

I knew there was something more to this than some stupid fight. This is about revenge!

Magnanimous

It's about more than that, red. You put me in a quantum singularity, destroyed my empire, made me broke! And gave me this twitch. [eye twitches, completely ignoring his huge scar] It's about hurting you and I wish to go on hurting you, so I am going to humiliate you LIVE. And while I'm at it, I think I might do a little destruction number on this planet of yours!...Oh wow, I guess it IS about revenge.

So, who's the chick?

Kiva

"Chick"?

Coop

She's from the future.

[looks at Kiva] Yeah, right.

Coop

Tell the kid something about the future, Kiva.

Kiva

Little boys like you are used as target practice for "chicks" like me.

Coop

Okay, you slimy chump. First, you come back after I kill ya, then ya try to beat up my cousin and now you think you're gonna shoot the moon into the Earth?! Well, I got your trigger right here! [accidentally drops the trigger, which lands on Coop's lap. Coop sighs in relief, causing his belly to press the trigger, thereby activating the engine]

Kiva

You fired the engine!

Should have let a responsible child hold it.