Stevie McCord quotes from Madam Secretary

Elizabeth

If you never listen to anything I say again for the rest of your life, please hear this: Everything is more complicated than you think it is right now. And the only way you come to know that is through experience. And that's what this whole process of growing up is all about.

Stevie

Yeah. I know. I gotta go do that now.

Stevie

What did stepping it up mean?

Elizabeth

Stress positions. Physical abuse. Waterboarding. I wasn't in the room when they did it. But I knew what was happening, obviously.

Stevie

Why are you telling me this?

Elizabeth

'Cause I have to.

Stevie

Well, I really wish you hadn't.

Elizabeth

We were at war. Changes the landscape. It forces you to face things you didn't even want to know.

Stevie

Yeah, like the fact that your mother is not the person you thought she was at all.

Elizabeth

Eat this.

Henry

I'm not hungry.

Elizabeth

Fascinating. Eat this.

Stevie

And drink this.

Henry

You two are terrifying when you're in agreement.

Elizabeth

You don't have to know all that stuff by heart, you know.

Henry

I want to be prepared.

Elizabeth

Classified briefs? The CIA doesn't even read those.

Stevie

If you look too smart on the first day of school, the other kids won't like you.

Henry

How are you guys doing?

Elizabeth

You know you guys can talk to us about anything. You went through a lot.

Henry

That goes for adult children, too.

Stevie

I know. I'm fine. Pre-law is a very overwhelming distraction.

Elizabeth

What about that guy you were seeing, the one with the cute butt?

Stevie

Mom!

Elizabeth

Well, uh, you said it. Garrett, was it?

Stevie

Jareth.

Henry

David Bowie's character in the Labyrinth? You're dating the Goblin King?

Stevie

God, you guys, he's never heard that one before.

Elizabeth

So how is he?

Stevie

He's fine... We've been busy. I... This conversation is far more stressful than the dirty bomb, okay? That's gallows humor; it's a coping method.

Elizabeth

We want to meet him.

Henry

I won't say the David Bowie thing.

Stevie

Okay. So, just to put your mind at ease about my social life, guess who's coming to dinner tomorrow?

Elizabeth

Jared?

Henry

Jareth! Like the David Bowie movie.

Stevie

You guys, you have to get all this stuff out of your system now. You can't embarrass me with him.

Henry

Oh, I think we can.

Elizabeth

Like falling off a log.

Stevie

Seriously. I like him. Plus, he's British, so he might not even get your sense of humor.

Henry

I heard we're huge in the U.K.

Elizabeth

(Fake British Accent) We will be proper citizens. Should I cook? Of course not. What should we order?

Stevie

I'll cook. You just show up and be cool.

Elizabeth

We can do that. I swear.

Elizabeth

Okay, who is excited for some college tour action?

Um, maybe you should hang back. Stevie said she could take me.

Elizabeth

What?

Stevie

I actually wouldn't mind a break from studying.

And it does sound like you have your hands full.

Elizabeth

What? That? That's uh.. it's a little kerfuffle at a gold mine in Chile. Just ten minutes at the office. That's it. Okay?

It's just... college is supposed to be my thing, and if we show up in a motorcade with diplomatic security and you and Blake constantly on the phone...

Elizabeth

I know, total bummer. Which is why I got us down to two cars, and I asked Blake specifically to tell the school not to make a fuss about anything. Because I get it, Ali, you want to be normal, but that goes for me, too, you know. And this is a really big deal, and I don't want to miss out on it, and I really want to come.

Okay. Let's go.

Elizabeth

Okay! Okay, okay. And you know what? I'll tell you what. Stevie'll come, too. It'll be... Look at that, you already packed a bag.

Stevie

Yeah, you know, just in case.

Elizabeth

G'morning.

Blake

Morning. Here's a copy of today's agenda.

Elizabeth

Thank you. And did you get the--

Blake

Four lemon-blueberry and a vegan scone, in case Stevie joined us.

Stevie

That's just eerie.

Blake

Mm. Thank you. Uh, also, I took the liberty of highlighting various students' online reviews of professors at Rafferty College. The debate professor is wonderfully polarizing.

Mom, I don't think you pay Blake enough.

Elizabeth

Oh, I am sure I don't.

Stevie

Mom. Forget it. They're not listening.

Elizabeth

I always listen to the voice of protest.

Stevie

I give up. Want to watch a crappy pay-per-view?

Elizabeth

Why can't I just explain it to them?

Stevie

Because they grew up thinking that all conflict is injustice. That's what you get for giving everyone a trophy for showing up.

Elizabeth

Well, for someone who got quite a few of those trophies, you turned out way cool, you know that?

Stevie

Thanks, Ma.

Stevie

Are you never not fully groomed?

Blake

It's before 10:00 p.m.

Elizabeth

Tell me this isn't real.

Blake

It was posted by an indigenous human rights group in Chile. He made the same video in Spanish and his native language.

Stevie

It says he'll be doing a live feed until he reaches the top or dies, whichever comes first.

Elizabeth

He could die?

Blake

Well, temperatures at the peak at this time of year average negative forty degrees, so yes.

Elizabeth

If he's right, if Chile violated a treaty with their own indigenous people, then everything these kids are yelling could be true.

Stevie

I hate to say it, but if this thing's up already, it kind of doesn't matter if it's true or not.

Blake

Not going there yet.

Stevie

No, she's right. Nobody cares about the legal sale of mineral rights, but you give 'em an indigenous James Franco taking his righteous cause up the mountain with a GoPro?

Stevie

Okay. Come on, guys, delete the photos.

Or what? Your mom and her fascist goons will hunt me down?

Fascism is the direct opposite of a representative democracy, which you happen to be lucky enough to live in thanks to people like our mother who defend it every single day. And by the way, you attacking and trying to silence people because they don't agree with what you think kind of makes you the fascist.

Stevie

Mom? Mom?

Elizabeth

Hmm?

Stevie

We need to talk.

Elizabeth

Is is protesters? What?

Stevie

No. It's Alison. She says we're not fun.

Elizabeth

What?

Stevie

She said that we used to be fun and now we're not.

Elizabeth

Stevie, can we just.. Let's wait until tomorrow when we're at the breakfast buffet with those waffles and the weird bacon.

Stevie

Mom, she's right. When's the last time we played cards?

Elizabeth

What?

Stevie

We used to play cards all the time. And you would let me eat that marshmallow cream straight out of the jar. We never do stuff like that anymore.

Elizabeth

Because the marshmallow cream made you sick.

Stevie

No. We're so careful all the time.

Elizabeth

You wanna play Go Fish?

Elizabeth

Is Hello Kitty still in?

Stevie

Oh, Hello Kitty is the Chanel of our time. It'll never be out.

Elizabeth

That's just a little bit depressing.