Elizabeth McCord quotes from Madam Secretary

Elizabeth

Thing is...I just don't want a nineteen year old zoning our neighborhood.

Henry

We could end up with a bunch of juice bars and artisanal vape shops.

Elizabeth

If Jason genuinely believes that Reynolds would make a better president, I don't have a problem with him wearing it.

Henry

No matter how obnoxious and disrespectful it may be.

Henry

How's the world doing today?

Elizabeth

Well, the fate of the Middle East rests on China's appetite for chicken.

Elizabeth

Stevie's engaged!

Juliet

Wow! You like the guy?

Elizabeth

Yes, I do. Maybe even more than she does.

Elizabeth

It's freezing in here.

Juliet

You get used to it. It burns calories.

Elizabeth

Make it clear that we are respectfully declining the gift horse.

Blake

May I ask why?

Elizabeth

So many reasons, not the least of which -- we don't have anywhere in the State Department to put her!

Henry

Oh, hey, here's something weird. I got a call from the CIA. They want me to come in for an Ex Post Facto Re-Debrief regarding Black Dog Station.

Elizabeth

Well, I was in the CIA for 20 years, and I've never heard of an Ex Post Facto Re-Debrief.

Henry

When they shut the operation down, they called it a "hotwash," now they want to get me debriefed. Why does all their terminology sound like that happens in a nursing home?

Elizabeth

Not only did Minister Chen undercut our deal at the last minute, he chose to do so in a very public and embarrassing way.

Blake

So he...he trolled us?

Arguably tried to bigfoot us.

'Elizabeth

I believe the correct diplomatic term he "pantsed" us.

Well, you looked smokin' hot on your magazine cover.

Elizabeth

Oh, my God, do you see that? I mean, even in my own house, I am appraised like a show pony!

All I said was you looked hot.

Elizabeth

Alison, it's not a reality show!

Elizabeth

Okay, that was a bad "um." What does that "um" mean?

Daisy

[about media coverage] It hasn't been as focused on the peace deal as we'd like.

Matt

Some pundit on Twitter is calling you Madam Sexy-tary.

Elizabeth

[after Stevie describes what a Memorandum of Understanding is] It's nice to know that *one* of my kids listens to me.

Stevie

Actually, I was listening to Russell Jackson.

What about a membership at one of those big box stores you have here?

Elizabeth

Yeah. You bet.

Inflation in Venezuela makes prices on basic goods very high. So if I could purchase a few things in bulk, even with the cost of shipping, I'd be a hero to my mother.

Elizabeth

Oh, yeah. I get it. I've got a pantry full of toilet paper. We're gonna make that happen.

Nevertheless, I must go back to Caracas and rather awkwardly withdraw my support for your memorandum until the situation is settled.

Elizabeth

Can you just stick around for another day? Just give us a chance to straighten this out? Anything you need, my staff will provide it. And...I might have a lead on a couple of Hamilton tickets. We'll get you up to New York. Stay at the Plaza Hotel.

Eh, I've already seen the original cast.

Elizabeth

Do you have any idea what they are talking about?

Henry

Not a clue.

Uh, Mom, is it Caribbean Day at work?

Jason

It's 38 degrees outside

Elizabeth

Yes, well, it's 84 degrees in Singapore, so...

Henry

Oh, right. The Singapore Interchange... What... You're leaving today?

Elizabeth

Yeah, I told you that.

Henry

No. You said it was a maybe.

Elizabeth

Oh... Well, now it's a strong tentative yes. I mean, I-I just... I don't want to jinx it. You know, we really are this close (she pinches her fingers together) to having a meaningful territorial accord with all the countries of the Asia Pacific, including China. Boom!

Jason

Wow, so what? You've uh, you've figured out who's getting all the oil and natural gas in the South China Sea?

Elizabeth

No, not... that. But we have settled the fate of the disputed islands, yes, and... fishing... and...

Jason

That's good, too.

He's only interested because the Philippines are involved, and he's obsessed with their new president, that Andrada guy.

Jason

Oh, like you aren't.

Of course I am. He's a total genuine psycho.

Elizabeth

Okay, Can we just go with 'rough around the edges' for the sake of diplomacy?

Jason

I'm sorry. Have you seen the videos he made during his campaign where he dressed up like his opponents and mocked them?

And challenged them to kickboxing matches in kickboxing gear.

Elizabeth

I concede that President Andrada ran an unconventional campaign.