Dr. Jack Shephard quotes from Lost

Jack

I can't.

Locke

Why can't you?

Jack

Because I'm not a leader.

Locke

Yet they all treat you like one.

Jack

I don't know how to help them. I'll fail. I don't have what it takes.

Christian Shephard

So, you want to tell me what happened?

Jack Shephard

A couple guys jumped Marc Silverman.

Christian Shephard

A couple guys jumped Marc Silverman. But they didn't jump you?

Jack Shephard

[beat] No.

Christian Shephard

I had a boy on my table today. I don't know, maybe a year younger than you. He had a bad heart. It got real hairy, real fast. And everybody's looking at your old man to make decisions. And I was able to make those decisions because at the end of the day, after the boy died, I was able to wash my hands and come home to dinner. You know, watch a little Carol Burnett, laugh till my sides hurt. And how can I do that, hmm? And even when I fail, how do I do that, Jack? Because I have what it takes. Don't choose, Jack, don't decide. You don't want to be a hero, you don't try and save everyone because when you fail... you just don't have what it takes.

John Locke

I'm an ordinary man, Jack, meat and potatoes, I live in the real world. I'm not a big believer in magic. But this place is different. It's special. The others don't want to talk about it because it scares them. But we all know it. We all feel it. Is your white rabbit a hallucination? Probably. But what if everything that happened here, happened for a reason? What if this person that you're chasing is really here?

Jack Shephard

That's impossible.

John Locke

Even if it is, let's say it's not.

Jack Shephard

Then what happens when I catch him?

John Locke

I don't know. But I've looked into the eye of this Island. And what I saw was beautiful.

Kate

It's just that you... and the tattoos... don't add up. Were you one of those hardcore spinal surgeons or something?

Jack

That's me. Hardcore.

Charlie

If you two are done verbally copulating, we should get a move on.

Jack

[Trying to get Shannon's inhalers] You attacked a kid for trying to help his sick sister.

Sawyer

No, I whooped a thief 'cause he was going through my stuff--

Jack

Yours? What makes it yours?

Sawyer

--which I had to move because everybody wants to help themselves.

Jack

You can just take something out of a suitcase, and that makes it yours?

Sawyer

Look, I don't know what kind of commie share-fest you're running over in cave town, but down here possession's nine-tenths and a man's got a right to protect his property.

Jack

Get up!

Sawyer

Why, you wanna see who's taller?

Jack

I said get up!

Jack Shephard

[about Sawyer] I'm going to kill him.

Kate Austen

That's not going to help us get the medicine.

Jack Shephard

Maybe not, but it'll feel good.

Hurley

Welcome to the first and... hopefully last Island Open! It's two holes, for now, three par, and no waiting!

Jack

Hurley, you built... a golf course?

Hurley

Rich idiots fly to tropical islands all the time to whack balls around!

Michael

[incredulous] All the stuff we gotta deal with, man... this is what you've been wasting your time on?"

Hurley

Dudes... listen. Our lives suck! Everyone's nerves are stretched to the max! We're lost on an island, running from boars and monsters... freakin' polar bears!

Michael

Polar bears?

Charlie

You didn't hear about the polar bear?

Jack

This is bad.

Michael

Yeah. I mean, I know what I would do, but... this has gotta be your call.

Jack

All right... give me the 7 iron.

Jack Shephard

That must have been a hell of a nightmare.

Claire Littleton

Who said it was a nightmare?

Jack Shephard

I'd say when someone makes their fists so tight they dig their fingernails a quarter of an inch into their palm they probably weren't dreaming about riding ponies.

So, I had an idea. I'm out here looking for some psycho with Scott and Steve, right? And I'm realizing who the hell are Scott and Steve?

Jack Shephard

I'm not following you.

Look, if I was a cop and some woman got attacked, we'd canvas, right? Knock on doors, find witnesses. But we don't even have doors.

Jack Shephard

Hurley, you're not helping me understand where you're...

Look, we don't know who's living here and who's still at the beach. I mean, we don't even know each other. My name isn't Hurley, it's Hugo Reyes. Hurley's just a nickname I have, alright? Why? I'm not telling. The point is, we've got to find out who everyone is.

Jack Shephard

You want to start a census.

Yeah, a registry, you know, names, what people look like, who's related to who. I mean, we start laying down the law, maybe we'll stop attacking each other. It seems like someone's getting punched, or stabbed, or something every other day here. We've got to find out who did this to her.

Jack

How're you doing?

Charlie

How am I doing? With week two of heroin withdrawal? Or how am I doing with Claire being abducted by the freak who tried to kill me?

Jack

I gave you aspirin for the heroin withdrawal.

Jack

What do you think his story is?

Charlie

Who, Locke? Guy's a freak of nature. Highly disturbed. Chances are he probably killed all his mates at the post office the day his mum forgot to put a cookie in this lunch tin. That was my first impression anyway. Then he saved my life.

Jack

Then you trust him?

Charlie

Trust him? No offense, mate, but if there was one person on this island that I would put my absolute faith in to save us all, it would be John Locke.

Jack

What is that?

Charlie

Claire's diary.

Sayid

You read her diary?

Charlie

Yeah, I know. I'm bloody scum.

Jack

Do you know how to use a gun?

Sawyer

Well, there's one polar bear that seems to think so.

Jack

[diagnosing Sawyer] Have you ever had sex with a prostitute?

Sawyer

What's that got to do with my headaches?

Jack

Maybe a lot.

Sawyer

...yes.

Jack

Have you ever contracted an STD? [Sawyer is silent] I'll take that as a yes. When was your last outbreak?

Sawyer

Go to hell, Doc.

Kate

I know he deserved it, but...

Jack

He needs glasses.