Chris, round up everyone you can get your hands on. Ray, wake up and get a van. Cartwright, stick some lipstick on. There's a blag on at Raxton Street Post Office in an hour. I want the lot of you in there and undercover! We're gonna catch these bastards with their fingers in the till!
S2 E2The Safe-Cracker
[to Sam] You always do this to me - I run in certain and walk out confused!
[to Sam] Y'know, If I was as worried as you, I'd never fart for fear of shitting myself
[Before an undercover sting operation, Annie is equipped with a gun]
I haven't received any firearms training. That's not right...
[Exasperated] Y'see, this is why birds and CID don't mix. Give a bloke a gun, it's a dream come true. Give a girl one, and she moans it doesn't go with her dress! Now start behaving like a detective and show some balls.
Thanks for being so sympathetic, sir. Let's hope you don't end up in my firing line. [Annie storms out]
[Slightly alarmed] Did she just threaten to shoot me?!
Got a very bright future ahead of her, that lass.
[Gene has locked Sam in the boot of his car after Sam has investigated alleged corruption charges against Gene's mentor]
The rules go like this; you're my officer, you do as I say!
I was following my instincts...
Well, I should charge your instincts with wasting police time!
GFGlen Fletcher
Don't take this the wrong way, DI Tyler, but you're a mental case.
[gives Tyler a gun] Here, wave this around inside and try and look hard for once in your life!
Have you never heard of softly, softly?
Yes, but I prefer Z-Cars! [he and Sam storm into the building] Don't move! You're surrounded by armed bastards!
S2 E3The Bombing
Look, you know when I said I wasn't wrong? Well, I was. But, I was right about this not being the IRA. I was right to follow my instincts. Just like you always say, "go with your gut feeling". Just taking your lead.
So I'm right?
We both are.
Right.
Right.
Just as long as I'm more right than you.
What is it you think I'm doing here, Tyler?
[Sarcastically under his breath] Building a Death Star?
What?
Nothing.
If you think I'm gonna let you walk away from this investigation, than you're in for an even bigger disappointment than when we found out the plonk Doris Bangs was a name and not a promise!
S2 E4Suburban Swingers
Woman in her twenties, dead.
Well I didn't think she was sunbathing, did I?!
DS Ray Carling [To DC Chris Skelton] Take my advice, get a pint of Pernod'n'Black down her then do what you like.
DGDCI Gene Hunt
I once punched a bloke for speaking French.
[Ordering the hunt for a murderer]
This is my city. And it will be a safe place for my wife and my mum to walk around in. Is that understood?
DDetectives
Yes, guv.
[Sternly] Right. Find out who the dead woman was, find out who killed her. Do it now.
[He checks his watch]
Hold up, hold up. Do it tomorrow morning, first thing. [Brightly] Beer o'clock, gentlemen.
So? He pushed a bird out a car. That doesn't make him a bad bloke.
[Sam gives him a look]
Oh alright, pull him in! I'll dance the fandango on his head!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Life on Mars pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.