Leverage Season 1 quotes

Parker

Where's Nate?

Sophie

Playing chess.

Parker

Again?

Sophie

Always.

Why'd you come to me?

Sterling

'Cause you're the best thief I've ever seen. I couldn't risk anything less.

Sophie

So, what, the salt was plan B?

No, no, that's, ah, that's plan M.

Don't I die in plan M?

Yeah, usually.

What you mean, usually? How many plans do I die in?

C, F, and M through Q.

C, that's a little close to home, man. You need to switch that up. How many plans does Eliot die in?

None. And [pointing to Parker] none. And [pointing to Sophie]...nnehh. There is a plan where he [Eliot] comes out of it with a scar from the temple through the eye all the way down to his mouth--

Parker

Ooh! You'd look so cool with a scar!

Sophie

Wait, wait, wait, go back, hold on, let's rewind--you skipped past me! You skipped past me.

Well, I have one, there is a plan, but it's evolving.

Sophie

Okay, that's creepy. Don't you think that's creepy? He's planning my death.

Until recently, they held these experiments in, like, a private farm facility, but after Schaevel's death, they moved it here, to the basement of the university Psychology building. Now, most people would dive into the question of, "why did they move"? I, however, am not most people.

You want to skip the "behold my genius" part and get to what you found?

Ever been quail hunting, Hardison?

Do I look like I go quail hunting?

Eliot

Let me ask him something. You ever played a video game where you go quail hunting?

You see, the birds, understandably, they don't like to be shot-

Parker

So they hide in the bushes. When you hunt, you have to beat the bushes with a stick. That way, you scare the birds into the sky, and there's a man waiting there with a gun and good aim, and he... [makes a gun cocking sound] ...picks them off.

That is seriously messed up. Why would y'all tell me something like that? [to Parker] Why do you know that?

Kid's making me nervous.

He's not doing anything.

Yeah, but that's my point, you know? He should be panicking, and he's not.

He's just a kid, Nate. How bad could it get?

How many grown men said that about you while you were raining digital fire down on their lives?

Ah, now I'm nervous.

[Showing his tattoo] Semper Fi. You know what it means? In English? Most people don't.

Eliot

It means "always faithful."

That's the promise a Marine makes to his country. They don't tell you it only goes one way.

Eliot

If this country was known for keeping its promises, we wouldn't need Marines, would we?

[Laughs] You got that right, brother!

Eliot

What do you want to know? Names? Dates? Locations? What food was on their breath? Their eyes? You want to know what color their eyes were? Want to know the last words they spoke? Want to know which ones deserved it? Or better yet, the ones that didn't? Want to know which ones begged? Want to know why I know these things? Because I can’t forget. So there’s nothing you can do, no punishment you can hand out that I don't live with every day. So to answer your question, no, I never counted. I don’t need to.

Parker

So, remember last night when you were playing with your pretend friends?

They're not pretend. They're just not in the same room as me.

Parker

They're an elf, a dwarf, and a thing with a tail. I'm pretty sure they're pretend. Remember when you took the thingy with the glowing thingy and used it to kill the guy who was on the shiny stuff and also there was all this magic?

[smiles] I think so

Parker

That was so cool. I mean how many people here are cool enough to kill the guy with the thing?

You're right. That was pretty cool.

Parker

Yeah [kisses his cheek and walks away]

No, but the fact that she thought it would work, that worked.

Parker

Should I tell him it's the age of the geek?

He'll figure it out eventually.

Now, I got four minutes to prove your theory wrong.

What theory?!

That torture doesn't work.

Would you describe yourself as having any kind of life outside of work?

Uh, excuse me?

Do you have any outside interests? Do you do ever do anything but than this?

Of course I do. I... Why does this even matter? This is so...

Well, your coworker suggested I ask.

She did. You know what you should ask her?

Sophie

[spluttering] I'm--could--could you repeat--

"Career," heh.

Sophie

No, I wouldn't say that my acting career fizzled, I just...I just put it on hold to pursue other things.

But he implied it might have something to do with ageism.