Judge Moredock quotes from Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

It's a fact that Aptril causes anxiety and insomnia.

I suffer from anxiety and insomnia. I don't go around and shoot people.

I want her brought before the disciplinary committee for badgering Jeffrey. My clients are furious.

Clients?! Jeffrey Lynwood is your client. Not his parents. [to the judge] I'm moving to disqualify Mr. Granger as counsel.

Oh, she's posturing.

You're a sleaze bag! You're letting Jeffrey's father call the shots, because he can pay you and Jeffrey can't.

I'm acting in my client's best interests.

Your client has as much business on a witness stand as I do riding in a rodeo! Only a horse's ass would ignore his diminished mental capacity.

You're outta line, your honor.

And you are a disgrace to the defense bar, Mr. Granger! And if you don't get your act in line, I'll grant her motion and report you to the disciplinary committee. Now, get out!

Dr. Sopher, you conducted a study involving the brain imaging of alcoholics.

Yes, and the results indicate...

People renew their objection to this hearing in its entirety.

Counselor!

It doesn't matter what voodoo science she trots out as an excuse. Intoxication has been banned as a defense to rape and murder dating back...

The People didn't meet their burden for rape. That charge was dropped!

[corrects herself] Banned as a defense to murder, dating back to the 19th century.

Would your honor remind Miss Paxton that the entire point of a Frye hearing is to consider the admissibility of new science at trial.

I do have other matters to consider. Objection overruled.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I warn you: What you are about to see is graphically violent. And forensic evidence proves that these are the indisputable actions of the defendant.

Objection! Move for a mistrial, your honor!

Dalton

No! She can't play that! She told me the jury couldn't see this one!

Bailiff, remove the jury!

Wrong one! [stops and ejects the disc] Your honor, I have no idea how this happened.

Counselors, my chambers!

Benson

Where would you like me to administer the test, your honor? Right at the defense table?

Dalton

Guess again.

Unfortunately, the prosecution.

Benson

No. You can't be serious.

Could you please clear this up, Olivia? They're trying to ruin my reputation.

I have no desire to ruin your reputation, counselor. [to Benson] Detective, were you drinking with Miss Paxton last night?

Benson

I wasn't drinking.

Was she?

Benson

I saw her consume two drinks.

So you did lie to me. How many drinks did you have after Detective Benson left?

I object to this line of questioning, your honor.

Then blow!

No. I can attest, as an officer of this court, that I am not intoxicated.

Benson

Sonya, your eyes are bloodshot and watery, your speech is slurred, and you stink of booze. Now, blow.

I thought you were my friend.

Benson

Just do it.

Don't do this to me, Olivia. Please don't do this to me.

Benson

You did this to yourself, Sonya. Now, blow.

Benson

I got it.

Bring it up here. Let me see.

I saw it, your honor. It's .07. It's legally sober.

I was hoping for a 0.

Benson

It's still climbing.

For the record, your blood level count is .082.

That's residual from last night. I'm fine, your honor. I am ready to proceed.

Counselor, you have a problem. I'm ordering you removed from this courtroom.