Kristin Cavallari quotes from Laguna Beach: The Real Orange County

Kristin

I’m the only one that wore white. I’m different.

Kristin

I hate Stephen. No. Anytime I’m not like all over him, he freaks out and doesn’t know how to act or anything. It pisses me off.

Kristin

My car is dunzo!!

Kristin

[after Stephen tries to scare everyone dressed as a bear] Oh, my gosh, Stephen, that was so lame. You didn't even look like a bear.

Kristin

Lauren thinks she's really cool, but she's a bitch!

Do you know if Stephen has talked to Lauren like recently at all?

Kristin

Uh, they’re friends, but she’s a stuck up little brat.

Oh, I know!

Kristin

But he’s mine. [they laugh]

If you and Stephen had babies, they’d be so good looking. [Kristin laughs] They would.

Kristin

‘Cause Stephen’s all tan.

Stephen’s hot.

Kristin

Stephen’s really hot.

Kristin

Yeah, I don’t know. I’m really stressed out on Stephen and Lauren because last night, he told me he was going to bed early, and today I found out he was at her house.

Talan

Do you know if they hooked up?

Kristin

He says that they didn’t.

Talan

Does that bum you? I mean, it’s kinda funny, you guys like have a relationship that’s like on and off. ‘Cause you hook up with him, he hooks up with Lauren, you hook up with him, he hooks up with Lauren, I kind of come in on the side and like grab one of you every once in a while.

Kristin

Yeah.

Talan

Gosh, our town is so small. We need another girl.

Kristin

What is that supposed to mean?

Talan

I don’t know, I’m kind of sick of hooking up with the same girl.

Kristin

You’re sick of hooking up with the same girl? Who?

Talan

You know it’s you. It’s seems like whenever I call you, you’re with Stephen, and whenever I call Lauren...

Kristin

She’s with Stephen. Either wants to go back out or stop whatever we’re doing.

Talan

So you think it’s Lauren’s fault they’re hanging out all the time?

Kristin

I think it’s both their faults. I just hate Lauren. She needs to go out of my life.

Talan

That’s a little harsh.

Kristin

I want to get out of here, I'm leaving!

I swear if Kristin says one more time she wants to leave I'm gonna pick her up and physically remove her from the hotel!

Stephen

So what did you think?

Kristin

Well I mean I didn’t really do much.

Stephen

If you do again you have to promise me that you’ll actually like wanna do it. So we don’t like waste our time.

Kristin

Sorry for wasting your time Stephen.

Stephen

You didn’t waste my time, it just seemed like you were wasting your time.

Kristin

Okay, whatever. Then I don’t like it.

Stephen

You wanna go? [She nods] All right, let’s go.

Kristin

Thanks for taking me surfing.

This is gonna be an adventure for me. Do you think Stephen could be in a jealous rage again?

Kristin

With Stephen, you never know.

Feta cheese? [Kristin laughs] Feta cheese?

Kristin

I told you, they don’t even know what it is. Feta it’s...

You know what this is? It’s like goat.

Kristin

[laughs] Told you. You guys, just get out. You don’t even know like anything about cooking. Just get out.

Hey. I’ll have my pasta without feta cheese please.

Kristin

It doesn’t go on the pasta, dumbass.

Hey Stephen.

Stephen

Yeah?

Wanna go to Jack In The Box?

Kristin

Shut up. You guys are so mean.

Kristin

Last night with Stephen was really, really weird.

Why?

Kristin

It wasn’t so weird, it was just like, I don’t know.

What did you cook for them last night?

Kristin

[laughs] Um, like bow tie pasta with chicken and Alfredo sauce. It tasted like feet.

Kristin

[in her car after smoke starts coming out the hood] It's gonna explode!

I wanna get out. I wanna get out. Im really scared right now!

Notice every person that honks is driving a nice car.

Kristin

BMW, Mercedes, fucking Range Rovers. Yeah!

It's fate telling you, you need to get a new car.

Kristin

Exactly! I'm gonna be like Dad: You're Buddhist, you believe in that.