Escargoon quotes from Kirby: Right Back at Ya!

[after having watched the Winged Star Rider's defeat and angrily growls] These Air Riders is a bust. Whatcha givin' me?

Hold on there, gents. After all, the show's not over yet, now, is it?

Escargoon

No, but it better have an unhappy ending.

This last one better do the trick or you in trouble here!

You'll see that Shadow Star's the grand finale.

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Uh-oh. Escargoon? Yo! You okay? I done mistook you for a ghost!

Escargoon

...How many ghosts take showers?

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[In the morning, at the Castle]

Escargoon

Dedede's a rotten boss to work for. That I can't deny. He yells and screams and criticizes, no matter how I try. I deserve a raise, but the king refuses. All I ever get are bumps and bruises! He's a grouch. He's a grump. But I stay. Maybe I'll be king one day.

[King Dedede suddenly looms over Escargoon, but something about the former seems different; he's acting much nicer and more patient than normal]

So, I'm a grouch and a grump and a rotten boss, huh?

Escargoon

[Blushes nervously] I wasn't talking about you. It was a different tyrant.

That's okay.

Escargoon

Ah! [Exclaims] Look out! [He accidentally dumps the roses with a vase on King Dedede and whimpering. Dedede pull the vase off his head, Escargoon dreaming about to get clobbered by Dedede] Please don't clobber me.

[Chuckles] I sure won't.

Escargoon

Huh? You mean you're not gonna mash me with your mallet?

No, I forgive you.

Escargoon

Huh? You do? I wonder if I still dreaming. [thuds and Dedede walks away] He's acting like he traded personalities with a teddy bear. Must be a ruse to get my guard down. [Dedede returns with a mop] I knew it! [Dedede cleans up the mess on the floor with the mop] Huh? [Dedede still cleaning] You can't trick me by pretending that you're not angry. I know you're planning to mop the floor with me.

I ain't angry with you.

Escargoon

Please don't torture me this way!!

Let's let bygones be bygones!

Escargoon

It's hard to believe but, maybe he means it. [His eyes become bright with emotion, exclaims in happily] Sire!

Escargoon.

Escargoon

[He snatches the broom away from him and becomes serious again] There's no way I'm falling for that gag. You fooled me too many times. [He gives Dedede an elbow that makes him step back until he steps on the rose thorns; Dedede jumps in pain and then slips in the wet and falls to the ground as a vase falls on his head] Oh boy! I'm in for in now!

[a bump appears on his forehead] Why'd you push me?

Escargoon

[Whimpers, throwing himself to the ground to avoid the blows] I'm sorry!

[getting up again] That's okay.

Escargoon

[screams in shocked and Dedede laughs. He kneels before Dedede with a desperate look] That's it! I give up! Sire, please stop acting like you don't want to get even with me? [cries]

[placing a hand on Escargoon's head] I just want us to be friends.

Escargoon

[screams in horror] OH NO!!! THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!!! [cries again]

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[Togeira, inside his head, has just stored enough of his anger and now unleashes it into an explosive flaming rage from within him, causing him to let loose a rage-filled roar to everyone's horror while causing Escargoon whimpering at the same time] Now it's payback time!

TTuff

No more Mister Nice Guy.

Kirby

Poyo! Po, poy!

TTiff

He's back to his old self.

Meta Knight

No, the monster is still controlling him.

Alright Escargoon, who's been beating on me!?

Escargoon

[yells in panic, then laughs nervously and afterwards throws Dedede's hammer to Kirby] Uh, Kirby!

Kirby

Poy! [Dedede grabs his hammer back from him] Po, poyo? Po...

WELL NOW I'M GONNA POUND YOU 'TIL YOU'RE FLAT AS A FLAPPY-JACK!!!

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Aww... Ain't my new Scarfy-poos sweet, Escargoonie-goon?

Escargoon

Yeah, I suppose they're kind of sweet. The kind of sweet that makes you barf.

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[overhears Tiff's family laughing at him getting hit with a pie] Hey, what's so funny? [the family stops laughing for a few seconds, and then starts laughing again]

Sir Ebrum

You're quite the comedian, your majesty!

TTiff

A cream pie in the face... now that's a classic! [She and Sir Ebrum start laughing again while Dedede growls angrily]

Escargoon

Slowing down the tape for a moment, we clearly see the stunned expression on the king's face as he is unexpectedly pie-pummeled. [laughs at the repeats twice]

Lady Like

You also made my family scream many times in the past, your majesty. But now it's screaming with laughter!

TTuff

It's funnier every time they show it! [Dedede growls again before running out of the living room]

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Escargoon

Now listen up! His Highness is declaring a new law!

From now on, anybody in this here kingdom who says the word "poyo" is gonna be found guilty of treason!

Kirby

Poyo?

AH! Y'all heard that trash-talkin' traitor!

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EEscagoon

[Laughing] That's you, sire.

They're making a monkey out of me!

Escargoon

Oh, you've got to admit, it is pretty funny, sire. (laughing again) Huh? (sees his own drawing) I'll sue those little punks!

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[he grabs Escargoon's goatee] HEY! What's the idea torchin' my tongue!?

Escargoon

Sorry, Sire. But I had to act quick cause you can't afford to pay out any more prize money!

Let's see how you like you red pepper, You double-dealin' spice sneakin' slug, here!?

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[yawns] I ain't seen no flyin' saucers here. I just wanna go back to bed.

Escargoon

Sure. And wake up with an alien for a neighbor.

Then an alien for a neighbor for them no-town Cappies.

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Escargoon, I oughtta have yer license revoked.

Escargoon

Whatever.

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SKSword Knight

Forget it. It was probably just a shooting star.

Meta Knight

Hmmm. [notices King Dedede's wrecked limo] I do not think a shooting star could do that.

Wake up, y'all! We got an emergency! Close up them gates and head for your battle stations! We got a war on here! Hey Meta Knight! Get the lead out, you helmet head! Do some defendin' or somethin'!

Escargoon

Yeah, what do we hardly pay ya for, anyway?

Meta Knight

Sword, Blade. Let's go!

SKSword Knight

Yeah.

Blade Knight

Aye.

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Hey. What up, Triple D?

I need me a monster, and make it quick! I got an alien after me!

Did you say alien?

Escargoon

What're you waitin' for? Tell him how she attacked the castle!

How can I tell 'im while you're flappin' yer lips?

Simmer down, boys. Now, tell me more about this alien.

Escargoon

She's a little girl with a big ol' gun and a whole lot of attitude!

Very interesting. If this space girl is as tough as you say she is, I think I better send the "big guy". [sends Kirisakin to King Dedede and Escargoon as it roars and clashes its two scythes over its head]

Now that's a monster!

Escargoon

I think I'm gonna faint.

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[Surrounded by potato chip bags] Y'know, there's jus' somthin' about sittin' in front o' the TV all day long that gives me the nibblies!

Escargoon

Just look at this mess! Where do you expect me to put all these soggy sacks?