[reading a letter Mac wrote to baseball player Chase Utley] Alright, Oh shit there's stickers. "Dear Chase, I feel like I can call you Chase because you and me are so much alike." Really? "I would love to meet you some day, it would be great to have a catch. I know I can't throw as fast as you but I think you would be impressed with my speed. I love your hair. You run fast. Did you have a good relationship with your father? Me neither. These are all things we can talk about and more. I know you have not been getting my letters because I know you would write back if you did, and I hope you write back this time and we get to be good friends. I am sure our relationship would be a real 'home run.'"
“The World Series Defense” · Season 5, Episode 6
In this episode: Mac McDonald (3), Charlie Kelly (2), Dennis Reynolds (2), Sweet Dee Reynolds (2)
I hate to tell you this bro, but you do not have the core strength to scale the facade of Citizens Bank, you just don't.
What?! I work out all the time!
Yeah but you only work out your glamour muscles and you know it.
I work out my core.
No you do not work out your core. You're totally arm heavy, you're all bi's and tri's and everything else is just fat and, and ribs.
Bro I can do way more push ups than you and that's like 16 different muscle groups I think.
That is beyond retarded what you're saying right now. I can do way more push ups then you even though I was just hit by a car...
I do not appreciate being paraphrased. I choose my words very deliberately.
[in Green Man costume] Hey! Hey! Whoo! Whoo-hoo! Philly Phanatic! Philly Phrenetic! Huge fan, man! Seriously. Big time. [Philly Phanatic offers a hug] Are you serious? Do you mean that? Ha-ha! Bring it in, man! Bring it in. Ah, yeah! All right. Now, seriously. Man to man, mascot to mascot, I was wondering maybe if you could help get me in the game. You know, maybe hook me up with a Green Man routine. We do it at the stadium together. [Philly Phanatic belly bumps Charlie] So all right, now--I'm trying to talk to you, dude. I'm trying to have a conversation with you, you're belly bumping me. [Philly Phanatic offers a high-five but pulls it away when Charlie goes to high-five him]. I'll give you...all right, don't big league me now here, man. Don't big league. Look, I'm trying to have a conversation with the man behind the mask! I feel like you're big leaguing me, dude! Are you taking me seriously? [Philly Phanatic sticks his tongue out at Charlie] [Charlie punches and tackles the Phanatic]
G1Guy 1
Hey, that dude's beating on the Phanatic.
G2Guy 2
Is that a hate crime?
G1Guy 1
Nah, it's not a hate crime.
G2Guy 2
Wanna hammer his ass anyway?
G1Guy 1
Definitely.
MDMac, Dee, and Dennis
Oh! Whoomp, there it is! Whoomp, there it is!
And I will toss on Green Man and run around the field and go crazy as Green Man.
DDDee and Dennis
No, no, no, no, no.
Whoomp, there it goes.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.