Lets see, it was either the upstairs maid, or the butler, or the cook.
It was her husband.
Her husband? He didn't have any reason to do it.
He was married, wasn't he?
S1 E4Lucy Thinks Ricky Is Trying To Murder Her
I got a Mickey from Ricky.
S1 E5The Quiz Show
AAnnouncer
(during the credits) The part of Harold was played by Mr. John Emery. Freddie Fillmore was played by Mr. Frank Nelson.
S1 E7The Séance
Mr. Maryweather, I'd like to present Madame Ethel Mertzola. She's going to be our medium tonight. She's psychopathic!
Presenting Raya, the medium. Well done, Medium Raya.
I shall now contact Tilly! [in a monotone voice] Ethel to Tilly, Ethel to Tilly. Come in, Tilly. Over.
[Lucy accidentally sneezes]
MMr. Maryweather
Tilly! Tilly, is that you?
Yes, it's me Tilly.
MMr. Maryweather
But Tilly, that sneeze. Are you sick?
Sick? I'm dead!
MMr. Maryweather
Oh, that's right.
[Lucy gets too close to the fireplace]
Ow!
MMr. Maryweather
What's the matter?
I burned myself. It's awfully hot here.
MMr. Maryweather
Oh, that's where you are! Oh Tilly, I'm so disappointed in you.
My trance is wearing off, I think you better hang up now.
Ethel, you underestimate your transmitter!
S1 E24The Gossip
[feigning sleep] Grace Foster is running away with...
Don't stop now! Go on!
Grace Foster is running away with the milkman.
Milkman?
[still feigning sleep] Uh-huh.
Go on, go on.
Grace Foster y el lechero se van a salir juntos y...
In English! In English!
Grace Foster is running away with the milkman, and her husband doesn't suspect anything.
Go on.
That is all.
S2 E23Lucy Hires a Maid
What's your name?
PMrs. Porter
Mrs. Porter.
And what do I call you?
PMrs. Porter
Mrs. Porter.
Do you poop out at parties? Are you unpopular?
[later, after getting drunk from drinking a potent "health" tonic] Well, I'm your Vitameatavegamin girl! Are you tired, run down, listless? Do you pop out at parties? Are you un-poopular? Well, are you?
[whenever Ricky stages a new show] Can I be in the show?
No!
BRBetty Ramsey
I've loved parties ever since I was a little girl, how about you, Ethel?
I haven't been to a party since I was a little girl.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's I Love Lucy pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.