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Homicide: Life on the Street quotes

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Homicide: Life on the Street
All S1

S1 E15Unfinished Business

FFidel

You've got a weird way of talking.

Don't start with me again, Fidel.

FFidel

It's like you hafta use all these weird words, its like you're listening to the words like they were in a cartoon coming out of your mouth and you're watching them thinking "I'm cool, I'm cool."

One time, one time I'd like to hear about a murder that makes any sense. One time, for any reason.

You know, every day I get out of bed and drag myself to the next cup of coffee. I take a sip and the caffeine kicks in, I can focus my eyes again, my brain starts to order the day. I'm up, I'm alive. I'm ready to rock. The time is coming when I wake up and decide I'm not getting out of bed. I'm not getting up for coffee or food or sex. If it comes to me, fine; if it won't, fine. No more expectations. The longer I live the less I know. I should know more. I should know that coffee's killing me. You're suspicious of your suspicions? I'm jealous, Kay. I'm so jealous. You still have the heart to have doubts? Me, I'm going to lock up a fourteen-year-old kid for what could be the rest of his natural life. I gotta do this; this is my job. This is the deal, this is the law, this is my day. I have no doubts or suspicions anymore. Heart has nothing to do with it anymore. Its all in the caffeine.

OWOlder Waitress Applicant

One rule I don't abide by is, "The customer is always right." The customer is never right.

You know now, don't you? You got the fear, now. Don't you? Son, I don't usually find myself giving advice, especially to 14 year old killers, but please, please listen to me. Just this one time. Keep your ass to the wall. Don't trust anybody, don't believe anybody, don't help anybody, don't ask anybody for anything. Do you understand?

[Munch and Lewis are talking about a historic building they plan to turn into a bar]

PSPenelope Smith-Haddon

Surely you can understand our desire to protect that history, especially in connection to George Washington.

George Washington?

PSPenelope Smith-Haddon

George Washington... In 1793, he was traveling from Mount Vernon to Philadelphia. He stopped here.

He stopped here?

PSPenelope Smith-Haddon

Of course, it was a residence at the time.

George Washington slept here?

PSPenelope Smith-Haddon

Well, no...

He had dinner?

PSPenelope Smith-Haddon

No.

So what did he do here?

PSPenelope Smith-Haddon

Apparently the President, just coming from a dinner party where he had consumed quite a bit of wine, was in something of a bind. He had no time to seek out a public chamber pot.

Are you telling us the reason we can't tear down the bathroom is that it's where George Washington once took a whizz?

[She nods]

Hey, look, are you capable of giving us a straight answer, or do we need to drag your narrow behind downtown, and you can finish your lunch at the stationhouse.

PPreacher

You got Natty Boh on tap at your office, I'm in.

So, you're just gonna walk out on me?

I didn't walk out on you Tim. We're not engaged; so don't act like I left you at the altar.

How does your partner end up bumping his head if he was wearing a seatbelt and you were driving slowly?!?

Well...you know Bayliss.

Do you know what it is like, Frank, to work with Lewis? The man is a demon from another dimension!

You want me to come back? Why? Because we're friends? That's not true.

You're right. I've never been to your house, I've never met your wife. We are not friends. It ticks me off because you say what you think and you don't give a damn what I think about what you think. But there's one thing I know for certain, you change red names to black. And for that reason, and that reason alone, I want you back.

Stan, where's your grass skirt? I heard you looked fabulous.

You want me to snap on you, Felton? I'll snap on you right now.

Easy, Big Man. Can't you take a compliment?

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