Derek Shepherd quotes from Grey's Anatomy

Meredith

Remember when I was dead? Before I went in that water everything was so... complicated. Hard. And then you pulled me out of the water... and I came back to life. For a moment everything was so clear. As if the water had washed everything clean. Do you remember that?

Derek

I do.

Meredith

Me too.

Mark

The most refined, professional, lady-like doctor in this hospital came to my defense tonight. Best she could come up with was "he's a whore." [looks at Derek forlornly] I'm a whore.

Derek

I slept with her [Rose]. The whole time, I was thinking about Meredith. Who's the bigger whore?

Mark

I tried to change, turn over a new leaf. But the leaf isn't turning.

Webber

You weren't ready to change. And that's okay. Adele wanted me to change, to retire. Well, I'm still the chief and this weekend, I'm moving back home.

Derek

Does Adele know that?

Webber

Oh, she'll be fine. She was wrong. I was right. And now we're––

Mark

Doing it like bunnies. [mutters to himself] I can't change. I can't change. I can't change.

Webber

Be who you are. I am who I am. A man.

Mark

A man. [Derek shakes his head in amusement] I have a way about me. A man who is who he is. I have a right to be that man.

Derek

[shakes his head] Tsk. I'm not gonna say anything. No judgement. [looks at Mark] The man you are: you slept with my wife. [looks at Richard] And you: you've been on my land for six months. But I've got no judgement.

Meredith

Stupid, corny, idiotic, I cannot believe I did this. Stupid, loser, son of a... I could be at home instead of, ugh, stupid brain man...

Derek

Meredith.

Meredith

Where have you been?! I've been waiting and waiting for you! And I did this stupid, embarrassing, humiliating, corny thing. And I was just gonna tell you that, this over here is our kitchen, and this is our living room, and over there that's the room where our kids could play. I had this whole thing about I was gonna build us a house, but I don't build houses because I'm a surgeon! And now I'm here feeling like a lame ass loser. I got all whole and healed and you don't show up. And now it's all ruined because you took so long to come home! And I couldn't even find that bottle of champagne.

Derek

This the kitchen? Living room? - a little small. I think the view's much better from here. And that's the room where the kids are going to play? Where's our bedroom?

Meredith

I'm still mad at you and I don't know if I trust you, I wanna trust you, but I don't know if I do. So I'm just gonna try, I'm gonna try and trust you. Because I believe that, we can be extraordinary together rather than ordinary apart and I wanna be... [They kiss]

Derek

I have to go.

Meredith

What?

Derek

In order to kiss you the way I wanna kiss you, and in order to do more than kiss you, I need to speak to Rose. I want my conscience clear so I can do more than kiss you. Stay here, don't move, wait for me.

Mark

Humiliating.

Derek

Yeah.

Mark

12? You're the best neurosurgeon in the country.

Derek

Thank you.

Mark

In the world. [Derek looks at him] Don't you want to say anything nice about me?

Derek

Uh, you're the best plastics guy at Seattle Grace.

Mark

[sarcastically] Nice, really nice.

Derek

Don't force me to praise you.

Izzie

Where's Mer?

Derek

She's not here.

Izzie

Oh. So you're just in there by yourself?

Derek

I'm not. I'm--I'm waiting for her.

Izzie

Love the outfit.

Derek

What do you want?

Izzie

I need cash. I ordered a pizza and Alex owes me 20 bucks, but he's not speaking to me because I saw him crying over his crazy girlfriend and there was a minute a week ago that I actually thought he was gonna be a human being and now he won't open the door.

Derek

Run into the bathroom. Just go. Go! [Izzie hides in the bathroom] Karev! Give me a twenty.

Derek

Thank you. [hands the $20 to Izzie]

Izzie

That was so awesome. Very cool. Not that I didn't think you were cool before, but, you know, I did not. I kinda just thought you were all hair and... [looks at Derek's lower half] you know. Now, cool. [Derek snickers] You want to share some pizza?

Derek

Ah, Dr. Bailey. I heard your big surgery went well today. Congratulations.

Bailey

Same to you. Must feel good to see your name in print like that.

Derek

It would feel better if Meredith wasn't so -- you know, she's acting silly about the credit. She's getting emotional.

Bailey

That girl worked her ass off for you and you got all the credit.

Derek

I would've gotten all the blame had we failed.

Bailey

But you didn't fail.

Derek

It's simple. I'm an attending. She's a second-year resident.

Bailey

Who you're now living with. That's not simple. It's messy. If it were me, I'd start with "thank you." You'd be surprised how far that one goes, especially with us silly, emotional women.

Izzie

Owen Hunt is a murdering, sadistic bastard.

Derek

Let me guess. First wet lab?

Izzie

He's stabbing pigs, defenseless pigs. Or as he likes to call them, "live tissue", because god forbid you should call them animals.

Derek

He is the new head of trauma, Stevens. It may not be ideal but if that's how he does things, you should roll with it.

Izzie

We don't need live subjects. What happened to "First, do no harm"? That's not just about humans. That's about all living things.

Derek

Actually, I think it's just about humans.

Izzie

I'm saying this to you as my roommate and not my attending.

Derek

Uh-huh.

Izzie

You disgust me.

Derek

I'm gonna yell at the major general. Wanna come?

Mark

Hell yeah. Be right there.

Derek

Hey Torres.

Callie

[from under the covers] Hey.

Derek

Marriage counseling. How's that going?

Bailey

You just heard us arguing about the marriage counseling. How do you think it's going? [Derek yawns] No, you are doing a craniotomy on my patient Rosemary Bullard today. Now are you gonna be awake for that or will you be yawning into a brain?

Derek

I need you to have sex with Cristina Yang.

Mark

Good morning.

Derek

Distract her, engage her, give her something to do after midnight besides call my girlfriend and wake me up.

Mark

Yang?

Derek

Mm-hmm.

Mark

No. No, Too serious, humorless, un-fun. Not my type.

Derek

Yang should be your type. She's intense, intelligent, complicated. She's like a single malt scotch and you're used to beer bongs.

Mark

Callie Torres is no beer bong.

Derek

Oh no, wait a minute, I get it. You don't think you have a shot. You're probably right.

Mark

Oh, I have a shot.

Derek

Then try it as a favor.

Mark

No. I'm not your stud horse. You can't just... tell me who to sleep with.

Derek

You slept with my wife.

Mark

Yeah, I'll give it a shot.

Cristina

[to Meredith] The wicked witch is dead.

Meredith

Metaphorically dead or dead dead?

Derek

Who are we talking about?

Hahn.

Cristina

Her name is off the surgical board. Her surgeries have been canceled. I don't know how or why, but I do know Hahn is gone.

Derek

That's too bad. She was really talented. [Meredith and Cristina glare at Derek] You're not talking to me. [gets out of bed and leaves]

Meredith

I need you to tell Mark to keep his "little Sloan" out of Little Grey.

Derek

Is he hitting on you?

Meredith

No, not my "little Grey". Lexie's "Little Grey". I don't know what's going on with her but the last thing she needs is Sloan going all man-whore on her. So you need to tell him to step away from Little Grey.

Derek

[Meredith has asked Derek to talk to Mark about staying away from Lexie] Little Sloan does not enter Little Grey. Are we clear?

Mark

Did you just say...

Derek

Mmmhmmm.

Mark

Okay, that's just creepy and inaccurate. Big Sloan.

Derek

[moaning coming from Izzie's room] Who's making a porno movie in Izzie's room?

Alex

Relax. She's flying solo. That's hot.