"Hello, I'm Big Bad Buddy Bird. I never agree with the group. I set a bad example for impressionable children everywhere." ~Roy [from Big Bad Buddy Bird]
All S1
Quotes from U.S. Acres
Let's turn [the princess in the changed Cinderella story] into a cowgirl.
Sheldon: No, a spacesuit. She's an astronaut.
Booker: Even better, let's make her a race car driver and she's got an evil twin.
Orson: No, she's a princess and there's only one of her!
[from Bedtime Story Blues]
"You will lose all your feathers during a total eclipse on Arbor day while listening to The Marine Corps Band playing "Home on the range" and watching a badminton match between two guys named Ichabod." ~Roy's fortune cookie [from Fortune Kooky]
Roy, your favorite show is on!
Roy: Garfield and Friends?! [from Badtime Story]
"And so Chicken Licken, Cocky Locky, Ducky Wucky, Piggy Wiggy, Sheepy Creepy, Lamby Wamby, Puppy Wuppy, Goosey Poosey, Horsey Worsey, Weasel Geasel, Turkey Lurkey, Hawky Tawky, Foxy Woxy, Eggy Leggy, Wooly Bully, Catty Fatty, Beaver Cleaver, Wormy Squirmy, Hoggy Woggy, Rooster Shooster, Fishy Wishy, Apey Wapey, Toady Woady, Mallard Ballard, Hippo Zippo, Mousey Wousey, and Chicky Wicky all went to see the king." ~Wade, reading Chicken Licken
[from Badtime Story]
RRoy
Read to the chicks? I can do that.
Wade: As can I! I wanna read to them.
Roy: I'm going to read to them.
Wade: No, I'm going to read to them.
Roy: Au contraire, ducko.
Wade: I don't care if you can speak Spanish, I'm still gonna read to them!
[from Badtime Story]
"[The CD is] stuck! That's what I get for buying a stereo from a horse." ~Roy [from Wanted: Wade]
RRoy
At this rate, I'll be done [putting the grain back in the silo] in time for Christmas.
Sheldon: What year?
Roy: That I'm not sure of. [from Unidentified Flying Orson]
Everyone thinks I'm a coward, and I resent it.
Orson: Wade, you are a coward.
Wade: That's why I resent it. [from Shy Fly Guy]
Aren't you ashamed of yourself?
Roy: No more than usual.
"You are bullies! You are nasty swines, you are. I would say that you are not fit to eat with pigs, except for the fact that you are pigs." ~Wade, confronting Orson's brothers [from Show Stoppers]
Now I'd like to do a little dance for you.
Roy: Don't! My earthquake insurance isn't paid up.
Orson: I am not fat! I have the body of a supreme athlete!
Roy: Well, give it back! You're getting it all stretched out of shape.
Orson: Roy, aren't you supposed to be selling tickets at the door?
Roy: What? And miss my chance to heckle you, Pignose?
Orson: well in that case, I won't dance."[The entire audience applauds] [from Show Stoppers]
What do you get when you cross a lasagna-loving cat with a bunch of zany farm animals?
Sheldon: You get picked up for another season. [from Show Stoppers]
"Man, I wish I had a line in this episode." ~Bo [from Cock-a-Doodle Dandy]
RRoy
Orson! The chickens is missing!
Orson: Shouldn't that be the chickens are missing? You see, chickens is plural, so of course you need a plural verb--
Roy: Oh, great! The weasel has the chickens, and you're teaching grammar! [from The Bunny Rabbits Is Coming!]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Garfield and Friends pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.